


Life Drawing

by YumeNouveau



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - College/University, Anal Sex, Art, Art Student Remus, Blow Jobs, First Kiss, First Time Blow Jobs, Hand Jobs, M/M, Model Sirius, Nude Modeling, Phone Sex, Scars, Semi-Public Sex, art student, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-13
Updated: 2017-08-23
Packaged: 2018-08-08 11:35:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 26,953
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7756228
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YumeNouveau/pseuds/YumeNouveau
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Remus, an art major, meets the incredibly gorgeous Sirius in the university parking lot, he thinks he's just another student. Little does he know that his class is getting a new model that he will not be able to take his eyes off of.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Life Drawing 1

**Author's Note:**

> All HP characters belong to J.K. Rowling

Remus always loved to be early. He had just parked his car, beating the morning rush of students to the small lot situated adjacent to his university’s art department. Stretching as he got out, the sandy haired young man pulled down the long sleeves of his oversized jumper to cover his arms against the spring chill. Grey clouds were thick overhead, a sure sign of rain later in the afternoon. Remus was just walking to the boot of the car to pull out his art supplies when he heard someone step toward him. 

Probably one of the girls in his life drawing class looking for him to tutor her...again, Remus thought, before his spun around and his jaw all but dropped. There, leaning against the side of his car, stood the most gorgeous man he had ever seen. It should be a crime to be so perfect. Long black hair was tied back in a tail at his neck, highlighting incredibly sculpted cheekbones. Grey eyes, stormy and wild, shone with mischief under perfectly plucked brows, and a smile that made Remus weak in the knees was directed right at him. Remus hoped he wasn’t gawking. 

When the man let out a little laugh he knew how futile that hope was. Remus bit his lip and pulled his brows worriedly together. 

“Sorry to bother you mate, but I was just looking for art building 5-A,” the handsome young man said, taking his weight off his hip as he slowly strode toward Remus, all liquid grace though he took no more than two steps. 

“Oh,” replied Remus once he’d found his tongue again. After being lost in the other man’s smile, he was surprised he could even remember the simple word. 

“Do you know it?” the man continued, sizing Remus up with a half smile. “I just figured you for an artist.”

Remus blushed and looked down at the giant sketch pad he had been about to pull out of his car along with his bag of charcoal and pencils. The man peered around, catching sight of the art supplies. 

“Oh I was right! Sorry to assume, but you just had that look. You know, slightly tortured but passionate.”

“You mean poor and starving don’t you?” Remus replied with a laugh, finally able to get out a coherent sentence.

“Well I hope not the starving part, but I’ll gladly take you to dinner if that’s the case,” the man said with a wink, causing Remus to flush and duck his head. 

“Er,” Remus said after he’d regained his composure. “You said room 5-A? I’m actually heading there now if you…”

“Brilliant!” the other man shouted. “See, I took a bus here, then they let me off aaaaaaaall the way down there,” he gestured wildly, “then one bloke sent me that way, and another directed me here finally but I still wasn’t sure. Really hate being late and all.”

“Same,” Remus agreed as he locked his car and stepped toward the young man. “Remus,” he said, holding out his unencumbered hand.

“Ha!” the other man shouted, and Remus was about to take offense when he also stuck out his hand. “Sirius. Always glad to not to have the strangest name around!”

Remus nodded numbly in agreement, completely caught up in the warm slide of Sirius’ fingers against his own. After breaking from the handshake, Remus nodded toward the art department. “If you’ll follow me. Although, it is a bit odd to have a new student in the class a month into the semester.”

“That would be odd,” Sirius said with a cryptic smile as they neared the door. “I must say, I can’t wait to see your drawings. I bet with those long fingers, you’re incredibly skilled.”

Remus blushed again. It was becoming a habit. A bad one. 

Both men walked over toward the row of easels surrounding a raised platform for the life drawing model to pose upon. The instructor, Professor Sinistra, looked up from rearranging the stools as the two walked in. 

“Remus, lovely to see you my dear,” she said sweetly as Remus took his usual spot near the large window. “And you must be Sirius,” she continued, shaking the other man’s hand.

“I’m glad you were able to get a new student into the class this late into the semester,” Remus said as he flipped open his sketchbook.

Sirius threw his head back and laughed. “Oh you haven’t figured it out yet? I’m not a student, I’m your model.”

...ooO0Ooo…

In the fifteen minutes before class began, Remus has spent fourteen and a half of them in a chaotic mess of hormone-addled shock. He was pretty sure he had done nothing but stare at one blank spot on his paper, barely acknowledging as his fellow students slowly--and then in a rush not to be tardy--swarmed in around him. A few of them had greeted him, Remus vaguely recalled, but he had no idea if he’d even replied back. 

Sirius was their model. That beautiful god of a man was about to strip naked for him--for everyone to see--and he was supposed to just sit there politely and draw him. Remus was both incredibly happy that his life had reached such a pinnacle of perfection and yet also about ready to die. Luckily Sirius had not been around to witness his mixed emotions, having taken himself to the nearby toilets to change. But soon…

Remus finally moved, laying his head down in his hands.

“You alright?” a girl to his right--or maybe left--Remus no longer was able to tell directions, asked sweetly. Remus nodded into his trembling fingers, taking deep breaths. He could do this. It wasn’t so bad. Just his perfect man come to strip naked for him in a school setting. In two hours he could laugh this off. If he survived.

“Class, now let’s get ready. We’ll start with four five minute sketches, followed by three ten minute ones, then we’ll take a break and come back for a half hour pose. We have a new model today as well. Everyone, this is Sirius.”

Remus knew he wasn’t the only one blushing as Sirius strode in, clad in only a--oh my god was that pink?--fuzzy bathrobe and sandals. A few of the girls around him started to twitter amongst themselves and he saw the young lady to his right was obviously blushing. Well at least he wasn’t alone in his attraction. 

“Hi,” Sirius said smoothly, catching Remus’ eye amongst the crowd and winking. Remus looked down again. Nope, he couldn’t do this.

He was just about to gather up his supplies when he heard Sirius climbing up onto the platform. Then Remus glanced up, and it was all over. Sirius dropped his robe, displaying an extraordinarily well formed backside in all his naked glory. Remus just stared. He’d never seen a body so perfect. Even though every nerve in his body screamed at him to run, leave before he embarrassed himself further, he couldn’t do it. He could not blow the opportunity to draw such a perfect man. 

Sighing, and incredibly glad his oversized jumper covered his denim-tented lap, Remus pulled out his charcoal and attempted to draw. 

The five minute drawings went by far too quickly, Remus was barely able to capture the musculature in his gesture drawings before the pose was switched. But by the second ten minute sketch he had finally eased into his rhythm again. Not only was he able to capture Sirius’ pose, but he was also able to distance himself enough to analyze Sirius’ perfect body without simply staring and forgetting to draw. But by then he had also noticed a pattern. Though the platform sat in the middle of the circle of students, each time Sirius was to change pose, he kept his back to Remus. After the fourth, now completely mastered, version of Sirius’ impeccable buttocks, Remus had begun to wonder, and by the fifth he was sure. Sirius was deliberately turning away from him. 

Between each pose Sirius was given a few minutes to dress, rest, stretch his limbs, and think on his next stance. As the final ten minute sketch was about to begin, Remus took a bold approach and slid from his seat with all his supplies and made his way around the circle on the opposite side to a vacant stool and easel. One of the girls he had previously tutored was to his left and greeted him sweetly as Remus once again unpacked his supplies and set up his sketchpad. 

Only upon looking up did he see what Sirius had done. Once again, the other man had turned to face away from him. His lean, toned legs were slightly parted, one hand stretched forth and the other behind, displaying beautiful firm back muscles. Remus sighed. At this rate he could be a professional ass sketcher. 

With the culmination of the ten minute sketches, the students and model were given a fifteen minute break. Remus looked up to see Sirius donning his robe, tying it tightly around his waist. He was then distracted as a small crowd of girls gathered around himself, complimenting his work. 

“I just love your shading,” one crooned, while another asked to see his charcoal so she could buy the same brand. Remus hated to brag, but today he was rather proud of how well he’d been able to set his mind to task and render his subject, despite obvious distractions. As Remus ducked his head from another young girl’s praise, he raised his eyes to meet beautiful grey ones staring right back.

“I knew you had skillful hands,” Sirius said, causing a hush to fall over the crowd of girls. Remus shrugged off the compliment as best he could and attempted not to blush. “I’ve been drawing since I was little, it’s taken years of hard work and practice really. I’m nowhere near as good as I’d like yet.”

“Well I’m certainly impressed. Would you mind if I kept it? Once the professor’s done with it, of course?”

Remus bit his lower lip as he nodded, thinking he would gladly give Sirius anything he wanted. Anything.

“I’m a bit parched, do you think you could show me to the water fountain...” Sirius asked, and a gaggle of girls started to open their mouths to volunteer before he finished, “Remus?”

“Er, yeah, of course, this way,” Remus said, getting up hastily from his chair, sticks of charcoal falling to the floor at his feet. About six girls reached to clean it up for him before he could even bend to fetch them.

“Thanks,” Remus said to the girls as they looked longingly as he and Sirius began to walk away.

“You have a lot of...fans,” Sirius chuckled as they left the room and made their way down a short hallway. 

Remus shrugged. “I help tutor some of them when I can. I had a wonderful art teacher in primary school, so I love to pass on what I know.”

“You’d make a great teacher one day,” Sirius observed, “though I have a feeling many of them are interested in a whole lot more from you than just tutoring.”

“Hardly,” Remus shook his head, stopping as they came upon the water fountain.

“So…” Remus began after Sirius had drank his fill and wiped his mouth on the back of his hand, “is there a reason you won’t face me during class? Not that the view hasn’t been spectacular but…”

Sirius eyes widened imperceptibly and if Remus didn’t know better, he’d have thought the other boy blushed slightly. Or maybe it was just the cold. Sirius was only wearing a bright pink robe after all.

“Oh, sorry, er, I’ll be sure to face you this time around,” Sirius said, scratching at his hair as they walked back into the classroom.

“Just, you know, it would be nice to have your face in at least one of my drawings, or I’m afraid Professor Sinistra may accuse me of being some sort of arse fetishest.”

Sirius laughed and put a hand on Remus shoulder. Remus hoped it would never leave.

“I solemnly swear to make you look like less of a pervert,” Sirius chuckled and squeezed Remus’ shoulder lightly before taking himself from his side and walking over toward the life drawing professor. 

Remus sighed. Sirius gestured as he spoke with Professor Sinistra, watching as the woman nodded back at him and ducked into one of the supply closets. Within moments of the professor’s departure, every spare inch of space around Sirius had been filled with girls. It seemed not to phase the young man one bit. He threw his head back and laughed at one before winking at another, so comfortable in his own skin. The complete opposite of Remus. 

Remus had never been comfortable in large groups. A close friend or two, that he could manage. But how Sirius could navigate the social nuances of a whole slew of women was beyond him. And he was even flirting with them, a skill Remus had yet to figure out in the slightest. Not that he wished to flirt with girls. He’d realized that long ago.

As Remus walked back to his stool he tried to shrug off his insecurities. It was silly to dwell on his antisocial tendencies when there were far more pressing matters to attend to. Such as why on earth he had thought it a good idea to ask Sirius to face him during his pose? Remus could say that it was in the name of art, but he knew he was fooling himself. He was curious, and incredibly attracted to the other man. And now he’d get his wish. 

After another minute the professor returned and told the students to take their seats for the final thirty minute pose. Sirius made his way to the platform, vaulting up with limber grace contained in a fluffy hot pink exterior. Remus dug out some lighter charcoal for his underdrawing before looking up, his brow raising in interest. Professor Sinistra had joined Sirius on the platform and had hoisted up a chair which Sirius was currently lounging upon. A long piece of cloth was being draped over the young man, falling in elegant folds over one shoulder, pillowing over his lap, and cascading down the platform. 

Damn it, Remus thought momentarily as Sirius looked over, meeting his gaze with a cheeky grin. He just knew the other man had done this on purpose as well. At least this time Remus, reasoned, he’d get to draw Sirius’ face and his--Remus held back a gasp--incredible abs. There, it was settled. Sirius was perfect. 

“Your thirty minute pose starts now,” interrupted Remus’ train of thought as he no doubt sat gawking at Sirius immaculate body. Remus refused to meet Sirius eyes, though he could feel them upon him, as he began to map out Sirius’ body in soft shapes before adding darker, more refined lines and curves with darker charcoal. Thirty minutes sped by in a heartbeat, though Remus could swear his own had stopped the moment he had first seen Sirius naked. 

“Charcoal and pencils down,” Professor Sinistra’s voice echoed through the silence of the room as the students took a last moment to finish their art, stretch cramped fingers, or crane their necks to see what their neighbors had drawn. Remus did the former, adding a last graceful swoop to Sirius’ mane of dark hair before placing his charcoal back in its case and standing to gather his belongings. 

After collecting his belongings, Remus glanced up and frowned. Sirius was gone.


	2. Life Drawing 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All HP characters belong to J.K. Rowling
> 
> Continued from Chapter 1

Sirius was gone. Not just gone from the platform, but nowhere to be found in the entire room. Remus' face fell. Not that he had had much of a chance to begin with. Why would Sirius stick around once he was finished anyway? Remus chided himself for having any kind of hope. Sirius flirted with everyone, he was sure. Nothing to get depressed over.

Walking over to a desk near the door, Remus dropped his sketchbook onto the pile for Professor Sinistra to grade. He almost left the room before he realized he'd left his bag and art supplies back at his easel. Sighing, Remus trudged over to gather his belongings.

"Remus, I was just wondering, do you want to grab lunch with us?" one of the girls asked, biting her lip as she handed him a pencil he had dropped.

"Oh," Remus said despondently, "Sorry, I have a lot of homework."

"Maybe next time?" the girl offered and Remus gave her a small smile that caused her to walk back to her friends blushing. Remus didn't even notice. Slinging his bag over his shoulder, he walked slowly from the room toward the parking lot, mentally kicking himself the entire way. Why was he getting so worked up over someone he had barely met? It was silly, he was too old to act this way, he told himself. Maybe one day he'd run into Sirius again and he'd not even remember who Remus was. He was building this up in his head into something that it wasn't.

Remus threw his belongings into the back seat as he got in the car, turning the ignition before quickly backing out. A rapid knock on his window caused Remus to jump nearly out of his skin. And then he couldn't help but grin. There, panting as if he'd run to chase him, was Sirius, his brows creased in worry. Remus must have stared for far too long for Sirius finally made a motion to roll down the window. Blushing in embarrassment, Remus complied.

"Hey."

"Hey," Remus responded with a smile.

"Er, you seemed in a hurry, but I was wondering if maybe," Sirius scratched his head nervously, "Maybe...you'd like to get coffee? Or something?"

Remus knew he was grinning like an idiot. And he didn't care. "I'd love that."

"Great," Sirius said with a sigh of relief. "Is there a coffee shop on campus?"

"There is, but it's pure shite," Remus responded as Sirius laughed. "There's another place nearby that's actually quite good. I can give you a ride if you like?"

"Sounds perfect," Sirius said, and Remus unlocked the door so the other man could get in. Remus was only a little disappointed that Sirius was no longer wearing his fluffy robe. But the man could sure fill out a leather jacket. Remus hoped his appreciative glance was subtle.

"I have to warn you," Remus said as they pulled out of the parking lot, "there's a dress code." Sirius cocked an eyebrow. "No admittance without a pink robe."

Sirius threw his head back and laughed. "Well this is my lucky day then! Can't wait to see you in yours!"

Remus colored and looked away. Sirius really was a flirt.

After a moment of silence Remus glanced back at Sirius who was staring at him. "What?"

"I just...I'm glad I caught you. I went to change as fast as I could but when I'd returned, you were already gone."

"Oh," said Remus, "Well...I didn't know. I thought you had left already to be honest."

"Really?" said Sirius.

"Yeah, sorry. If I'd have known, I would have waited. You should've said."

"How? You were surrounded by a whole flock of swooning girls!"

"What? No, at least...I don't think I was," Remus replied, a bit unsure as the tried to think back.

"Believe me mate, it was like an impenetrable wall."

"Sure," Remus said, rolling his eyes. Small raindrops had begun to fall, so Remus turned on the wipers as they made their way into town.

"If anything, YOU had the wall of women around you. I've never seen so many blushing girls. And the winking! Does that really work?"

Sirius turned his entire body toward Remus, who couldn't help but glance over just as Sirius winked. He blushed and faced the road once more.

"I don't know, you tell me," Sirius chuckled.

"So…" Remus started, thinking of another topic to change to, "how did you like modeling for us?

Sirius shrugged and brushed his dark hair back from his face. "Went well I think. No creeps in the bunch, which was a nice change. You don't know how often I've ended up with someone latching on to me or stalking me after modeling," he shuddered.

"I can't imagine," Remus replied worriedly. "Do you do this a lot? Model that is?"

Sirius nodded. "Yeah, as often as I can get the work. First time here, but I've gone to other UNIs, life drawing classes, workshops, things like that."

"Wow," said Remus, impressed. "Well I'm glad you came." Sirius gave him a look before laughing. "Er, you know what I mean," Remus felt his face redden.

"I'm glad I finally got to draw your face," Remus said, smiling over at Sirius.

"I really meant what I said about wanting your sketches, they're brilliant. I've never liked a portrait of myself so much, and believe me, I love seeing myself in art."

Both men laughed and Remus shook his head. "Of course, I mean, if I see you again I can give it to you."

"Why wouldn't you see me again?" Sirius cocked his head and flashed Remus a smile.

"I...I haven't the foggiest," Remus replied, turning up the wipers as the raindrops became closer to a downpour.

"What about you," Sirius started, "Have you always wanted to be an artist?"

"Pretty much since I could hold a crayon," Remus replied. "I really want to teach it one day, but first I need to get a lot better."

"You're incredibly talented already. Not just anyone has been able to capture my arse so fabulously."

"Well I did have to take some artistic license…" Remus started.

"Hey!" Sirius said, affecting a look of feigned hurt.

"Okay, fine, your arse is perfect," Remus said, hoping it would come off as a joke and not in the incredibly drop dead serious manner in which he actually meant it.

"Damn right," Sirius replied, crossing his arms and smiling smugly.

Remus pulled into a long parking lot just as the rain became a deluge. "Damn it, all the spots near the entrance are taken," he cursed, driving away from the coffee shop.

"I guess we'll just have to make a run for it," Sirius suggested.

"I could drop you off in front…" Remus started, but Sirius snorted.

"And leave you on your own to get soaked? Not a good start to a date!"

"To a...what?" Remus started as Sirius opened the car door and pretended not to hear him.

"Ready?" Sirius said, and Remus opened his door as well.

"Ready," he affirmed.

"Go!"

Both men bolted from the car, instantly becoming drenched in the downpour. It was almost impossible to see through the grey curtain of rain, but Remus felt a hand catch his own, pulling him along as they ran laughing through the puddles, around the parked cars and toward the awning at the front of the shop.

Completely soaked, both men hurled themselves under the awaiting haven of the overhang. Before he could catch his breath, Remus found himself suddenly shoved against the wall, his lips captured by the warm softness of Sirius' own as strong arms pulled him close. Completely caught off guard, it took Remus a moment to register that Sirius was in fact snogging the living daylights out of him before he gathered enough sense to both return the kiss and put his arms around the other man. He felt Sirius sigh into the kiss as he finally reciprocated. Long fingers trailed from his back to grab hold of Remus' hips, pulling him closer as Sirius deepened the kiss. Remus lifted his hands up, doing what he'd wished to do since the moment he'd laid eyes upon the other young man as he threaded his fingers through his dark wet locks.

Damn but Sirius could kiss. The heat of Sirius body moved into his own as they drew together, the soft warmth of his lips and tongue like a beacon that drew Remus ever closer. He had no time to think on his inexperience, to wonder at his inadequacies, for Remus's thoughts were completely overtaken in this heavy fog of sensations. He assumed that he must be doing something right, for Sirius seemed nearly insatiable, pressing his body closer into Remus' own, hands grasping tight to the small of his back, fingertips trailing tantalizingly close to his pant line. Small moans escaped Sirius' lips as Remus threaded his fingers into the other man's hair, pulling him to the side to slant their mouths more deeply against one another. When Sirius grabbed his arse, Remus tensed for a moment, a blush coloring his cheeks as he realized Sirius would undoubtedly feel how hard he was for him. But then all embarrassment was lost as Remus pressed back against him, the rigid outline of his cock rubbing against his own momentarily before Sirius seemed to gain some measure of control and pull back. Remus missed him already as their kiss softened and Sirius drew back, resting his forehead against his own.

"Damn," Sirius said, bring a hand up to gently draw along Remus' cheek, tucking a stray hair behind his ear. Remus could only nod, panting, his features awash with a look of pure shock. A moment later he could do nothing to prevent it as his knees gave out and Remus sank to the ground, back against the wall. He looked up at a stunned Sirius who quickly went to his knees and put his hand to the side of Remus' face.

"Remus! Are you…"

"That was my first kiss," Remus stated quietly, biting his lip before meeting Sirius' gaze.

"You...wow," said Sirius after a moment of silence.

"Yeah," replied Remus, smiling over at the other man.

"Er," said Sirius, scratching his head, looking slightly regretful, something Remus could not abide.

"I couldn't have imagined it to be more perfect, you know," he said softly, reaching up to cup Sirius' hand where it lay against his cheek.

Sirius' grin spread almost ear to ear, lighting up his grey eyes. "Well alright then. I would've kept going too, but I didn't want to scandalize the poor sods who might happen upon us."

Remus smiled shyly and ducked his head. "Maybe next time?" he said hopefully, not able to meet Sirius eyes.

Sirius stood up, flinging his hair back from his face and bending to reach a hand out to Remus. "Definitely," he replied as Remus grabbed his hand, hauling him up into a quick soft kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Continued in Chapter 3
> 
> Comments/critique welcome, they help keep me motivated!


	3. Life Drawing 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All HP Characters belong to J.K. Rowling  
> Continued from Chapter 2

Remus almost melted once again but stopped himself only by virtue of Sirius wrapping an arm around his shoulders. 

“So, how’s the coffee here?” Sirius asked, leading them slowly toward the door. Remus had almost forgotten where they were after that life-changing kiss.

“Good, they make a wonderful chai. And their drinking chocolate is incredible.”

‘Mmm, sounds perfect,” Sirius said, opening the door as Remus walked through.

“Remus!” a dark-haired boy shouted from behind the counter, “Didn’t expect you in today.”

“Oh, you a regular?” Sirius asked over to Remus.

“Er, something like that,” Remus replied as they made their way over. “Hey James, this is Sirius. We met in class today.”

Both men shook hands. “Should I be jealous?” Sirius whispered in Remus’ ear, causing him to laugh. 

“Hardly,” he replied quietly, “James and I have been friends since primary school.”

“When you birds stop gossiping, will you let me know what you’d like to order?” James said, pushing his glasses up his nose and smiling.

“The usual for me,” Remus said, “And for Sirius…”

“I’ll have that chai Remus recommended. And it’s on me,” he said, looking pointedly at Remus. “I got paid today.”

“Found yourself a sugar daddy?” James said, whistling and raising an eyebrow.

Remus blushed. “Er…”

“Poor bloke had to draw me naked today, least I can do is get him coffee,” Sirius supplied, grinning between the two men.

“Well that explains why Remus looks a bit in shock,” James laughed as he rang up the order. “I’ll have Mary bring over the order when it’s ready. See you back at home Remus?”

“Yeah,” Remus replied, grinning back at James as he and Sirius found some comfy chairs in a far corner.

“Now I’m really jealous,” Sirius smiled over at Remus. “You two live together?”

“Yep, we share a flat with my friend Peter. That’s his car I borrowed too.”

“Wow, must be nice living with friends.”

Remus nodded. “I mean, I kind of got stuck with sleeping on the couch, but they give me a break in the rent at least. When I’m home I’m usually drawing, sleeping or doing homework, so I don’t really need a room I guess.”

“Huh...yeah I guess,” Sirius said, raising an eyebrow. 

“What about you?” Remus asked, realizing he knew almost nothing about the man he had just spent the last five minutes madly snogging. 

Sirius shrugged. “Got my own flat, nothing fancy, but close to town at least. Haven’t lived at home since I was sixteen, so got used to being on my own. Though I do miss the company.”

“I bet,” Remus nodded before both were momentarily distracted as a tall brunette brought them their respective drinks. Remus clasped his hot chocolate in both hands, warming his chilled fingers before taking a long sip.

Sirius seemed to be enjoying his drink as well, a contented smile plastered to his face.

“So...nude modeling?” Remus asked quietly, raising an eyebrow.

Sirius laughed and set down his drink. “Well don’t they say ‘do what you love?’ And I love being naked!”

Remus couldn’t help but laugh along with him. “No, but really?”

“Don’t worry, I just do this part time between catalogue modeling gigs. I’ve been to a few unis and life drawing sessions, not always nude mind you.”

“Wow, so... you’re an actual model. I should’ve known,” replied Remus.

“Oh?” Sirius asked, raising an eyebrow, “Admiring me, were you?”

“Shut up,” Remus mumbled, ducking his head. 

“Don’t worry,” Sirius said, discretely taking Remus hand below the table, “the feeling’s mutual.”

Remus shook his head but threaded his finger with Sirius’ own. How this incredibly beautiful man could find him attractive was beyond him, but he wasn’t about to question it. 

“Maybe I just have a thing for fluffy pink robes,” Remus said completely deadpan, causing Sirius to snort and throw back his head. 

“Well then, I’ll just have to wish you and my robe the best and spend every night in my lonely bed bemoaning that the most perfect man I ever saw was horribly, irreversibly robe-sexual.”

“You just made that up,” Remus grinned, clasping Sirius’ hand tighter beneath the table. 

“Hey, it may be considered deviant behavior now, but with how these times are a-changing, who knows for the future?” Sirius said, looking off into some unforeseen distance. 

“Speaking of which,” he said in a much more hushed tone, “are you out? I just don’t want to, you know, out you in front of your friend.”

Remus shrugged. “I guess so. I never really had the ‘I-have-something-I-need-to-tell-you,’ talk with James, but I’ve talked about men I found attractive in front of him, so I think he’s gathered as much.”

“Ah, good, cause I may have to kiss you again in the next minute before I’m driven completely insane,” Sirius replied.

“I think you’re already insane,” Remus said, but leaned closer nevertheless. 

The kiss was quick, they were in a crowded cafe after all, but Remus lips tingled from the contact for minutes after. 

“So, what about you?” Remus asked after a moment of grinning like idiots at one another, “Are you out to your friends...or family?”

“Friends, yes. I’ve taken men with me as wedding dates, arm candy for modeling shows, stuff like that. Family...well...I don’t really want to talk about it. Not today anyway.”

Remus nodded. “Same. Kind of a third date-type of a conversation.”

Sirius smiled sadly. “Sorry though,” he said, rubbing his thumb along the back of Remus’ hand soothingly. “I never like hearing that someone else has a tragic past. Though with you being a poor starving artist, I should’ve known.”

Remus shook his head, glad the mood had lightened a bit. “Good thing I now have a sugar daddy to keep me from starving.”

“With the way you kiss, I will be buying you seven course meals to keep you around,” Sirius said, winking. “I still can’t believe that was your first kiss, how is that possible?”

Remus looked down at his lap. “I...I don’t know. I guess I never thought someone would want to kiss me, so I don’t exactly put myself out there.”

“What a travesty,” Sirius said, clucking his tongue, “but I’m glad I got to be your first.”

“And second and third,” Remus replied.

“And forth,” Sirius suggested, swooping in for another quick kiss. Remus’ heart sped up and he felt his cheeks flush. He could never get used to this.

“I hate to cut this date short, but I actually have a modeling gig in a couple hours,” Sirius said, finishing the last of his chai.

“Oh, sorry, let me drive you home then,” Remus apologized, making to stand. Sirius though, held onto his hand, keeping Remus seated for another minute.

“I don’t want to wait to ask, but when do I get to see you again?” Sirius said.

“Oh,” Remus thought a moment, “Well I have class the next two days, then I work during the day the next two.” Remus saw Sirius’ face fall. “But Friday night I always go out with friends to a pub, you could join us.”

“That sounds brilliant. Friday is so far away though, could I see you at all before?” 

Remus bit his lip. He’d never had anyone so eager to see him, it was all a bit baffling. “Well, you could join me on my lunch break on Wednesday. But if that’s…”

“Perfect!” Sirius said beaming. “Where do you work?”

Remus chuckled. “Er, here actually.”

Sirius slapped his leg and shook his head. “You took me to work...on your first date. Remus, you’re adorable.”

“What...I couldn’t...I didn’t know it would be a date!” Remus exclaimed.

“Really? I couldn’t stop staring at you in class,” Sirius replied, shaking his head at Remus’ obliviousness.

“What? No you didn’t, you faced away from me almost the entire time,” Remus said.

“Well...that’s because...er, I’ll tell you another time,” Sirius said sheepishly, a blush coloring his cheeks. Remus raised a curious eyebrow but left it at that. 

“Shall we?” Sirius asked after a moment, standing before Remus joined him and they headed out, waving at James as they left. 

“At least the rain’s let up a bit,” Remus observed as both men made another mad dash toward the car. Once inside, Sirius gave Remus directions to his flat as he reached to pull out his robe, using it to dry his damp hair. 

Remus was pleased to find, as he pulled up infront of Sirius’ place, that they did not live more than a few kilometers apart. 

“Well...” started Remus before soft fingers traced the side of his face, pulling him into a hungry kiss. Within seconds both men had their arms wrapped around one another and were silently cursing the center console that kept them from getting even closer. Remus was panting heavily, his lips plump from kissing as Sirius continued to devour his mouth. One of Sirius’ hands stroked his lower back before ghosting down to grab at his arse, causing Remus to moan into Sirius’ open mouth. 

Scooting from his seat, Remus maneuvered himself quickly over the middle divider and into Sirius’ lap. The dark haired man stared wide-eyed at him momentarily before renewing his groping, pressing Remus into him as his lips sucked a tantalizing line along Remus’ exposed throat. 

Remus had never been so hard in his life. His cock felt near to bursting as he rubbed against Sirius, feeling the answering hardness press against his own, trapped between frustrating layers of cloth. Remus parted his legs further, seating himself completely upon Sirius lap as both men groaned and thrust against one another. Strong hands grabbed his ass, holding Remus fast against Sirius, making his cock ache and press and rub against his trousers. Remus had no idea how he’d gone from never kissing a man to this within the space of a couple hours, yet he had no second thoughts. This was everything he’d ever wanted. Sirius was everything he’d ever wanted.

“Shit,” Sirius said, pulling away from the hunger of their kiss, “I don’t know how to stop kissing you, but I really do need to go.”

Remus rested his head against the side of Sirius’ cheek, panting heavily. “Right, sorry,” he replied.

“Don’t be,” Sirius said, taking Remus chin between his fingers and kissing him softly. “Just wish we had more time. Although maybe more space would be nice too, the car’s a bit cramped.”

“Agreed,” Remus said, regretfully pulling up from Sirius’ lap. The rain had cleared, so both men climbed from the vehicle, panting and flushed from their sadly curtailed union. 

“Oh wait, let me give you my number,” Sirius said, and Remus fumbled in his pocket for his cell. He couldn’t believe he’d almost let Sirius leave with no way of contacting him. 

Sirius promptly put his contact info into Remus’ phone and smiled as Remus immediately called him. 

“Now you have mine too,” Remus smiled shyly. 

“Call me to let me know about Wednesday. Or any time, you know, doesn’t have to be just for that,” Sirius said, rubbing the back of his neck and smiling. 

Remus nodded, biting his lower lip, and was about to thank Sirius when he was pulled in for a last, deep lingering kiss that left him breathless.

“See you later Remus,” Sirius winked before turning and climbing the stairs to his flat. 

Remus barely had the presence of mind to nod as he watched the gorgeous man walk away from him, unbelievably impatient for Wednesday to arrive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Continued in Chapter 4  
> Please leave comments/critique so I can both improve and meet new Wolfstar friends <3


	4. Life Drawing 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All HP Characters belong to J.K. Rowling  
> Continued from Chapter 3

Come Wednesday morning, Remus leaned against the counter of the coffee shop. The early morning rush had been nice, it had given him a distraction from counting down the minutes until Sirius would meet him for lunch. But now that 9:30 had come and gone, there was only the slow trickle of customers to fill his time. Looking both bored and forlorn, Remus was restacking the coffee cups for the uptenth time in the last half hour and trying desperately not to watch the clock. 

“Er, want to take your break?” James asked, returning from carrying a tray of coffee and scones to a customer. 

“No...well...I don’t know,” Remus said, leaning his head against the counter. 

“Damn, you’ve really got it bad,” James sighed, shaking his head. Remus had told his friend about his coffee date once James had returned from work on Monday, though he omitted all their more amorous activities. 

“I’m sorry,” Remus said, straightening and letting out a deep breath. “Maybe I’ll do a round of cleaning up the tables, then I’ll go.”

James shrugged, wiping his hands on a towel. “Whatever you want mate. Just try to look less dreary, you’ll scare off the customers.”

Remus smiled and rolled his eyes. “I’m way less scary than you are when Lily visits. I swear, your need to impress her is just...I mean, did you really have to try juggling those coffee cups last time? You know she wasn’t even watching until you dropped the one.”

“She’s just playing hard to get. I know one of these times…”

“Yeah, sure,” Remus said, ducking under the counter to make his way to the floor. He wiped down the tables, returned books to their shelves that scattered the walls, and grabbed empty cups and plates to be washed in the kitchen before taking his break. 

Remus sank into one of the break room chairs and looked down at his phone. Only 10:00. It wouldn’t be for another two hours that he would get to take his lunch and finally see Sirius again. The two days since they’d met had seemed like months. Remus missed Sirius, the sound of his voice, the feel of his soft lips, the smell of his stupidly sexy leather jacket. They’d been able to talk briefly on the phone at least, though it was no substitute for actually being with one another. Remus would prop his phone up while he drew, listening to Sirius talk about his day until one or both were too tired and had to call it quits for the night. It was never enough. 

Luckily, once Remus returned from his break, a wave of tourists poured in, keeping him too occupied to watch the clock. It was only when he was restocking the pastry display that Remus realized the time.

“Excuse me, but I see something I want,” a beautiful voice said, causing Remus to straighten up and blush. There stood Sirius, in that sexy leather jacket and trousers that could hardly have been comfortable given how tightly they hugged his incredibly fit frame. A rakish grin spread across his face as he winked at Remus before leaning over the counter. 

“Oh? Is it a muffin?” Remus asked, feigning ignorance.

“Nope,” Sirius replied.

“Hmm, a croissant then?” 

“Think more british and less french,” Sirius countered.

“Oh I know, a scone,” Remus said, attempting to hide his smile. 

Sirius looked around himself, making sure no one was watching before leaning in for a quick kiss. “Alright, I’ll just be off then…” 

Remus watched as Sirius made a play at heading for the door, but turned around and grinned taking a seat to wait instead. Sighing, Remus shook his head and headed into the kitchen.

“James, I’m off to lunch,” he hollered, watching as James surfaced from a sink filled with bubbles up to his arms. 

“Gotcha, I’ll tell Mary to watch the counter. Have a good one, don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,” James advised.

“So…”

“Just...don’t get him pregnant and be back on time.”

“Right,” Remus said, laughing as he took off his apron and hung it by the kitchen door. 

As Remus emerged from the back of the cafe, Sirius stood, grinning, and held out his hand. Remus took it without a second thought. It was strange how natural the gesture felt, so comfortable, like he’d been doing it all his life instead of now, for the very first time. 

“So, where shall we dine?” Sirius asked as they stepped out into the dreary London air. 

“There’s a good crepe place nearby, it’s only a block away. Unless you want something else?” 

“Sounds perfect,” Sirius said. He looked behind them after they turned the corner from the coffee shop then glanced back at Remus before stopping them suddenly. Within an instant Remus was enveloped in a tight hug that shortly became the warm press of lips against his own. 

“Damn I missed you,” Sirius said as he came up for air, running a hand through Remus’ soft golden hair. 

“I...me too,” Remus said, still a bit in shock. He couldn’t seem to fathom, not only how often Sirius wanted to kiss him, but that he seemed to have absolutely no qualms about doing so in public. It was both refreshing and flattering. 

“I guess we should probably eat,” Sirius said sheepishly, grinning up at Remus who pushed his fringe from his face. 

Remus nodded, reaching down to take Sirius’ hand once again. 

Once they’d reached the crepe cafe and ordered drinks and food, Sirius found them a booth in the corner. Sirius took huge bites of his ham and cheese crepe, while Remus savored his cavity-inducing, nutella and banana mess. 

“Alright, so let’s play that game, you know, one of those to get to know each other?” Sirius said through a mouthful of food. “I’ll ask a question, and you have to say the FIRST answer that comes to mind. No cheating. First thing okay?”

Remus nodded. “Alright, fair enough.”

“Okay. Cats or dogs?”

“Oh dogs, easily,” Remus answered.

“Okay your turn.”

Remus took a moment to think. “Would you rather burn to death or freeze?”

Sirius’ eyes widened. “How morbid! How does that help you get to know me?”

“That’s not an answer,” Remus scolded him.

“Well give me a better question then!”

“Fine,” Remus pondered, “What superpower would you choose?”

“Invisibility,” Sirius responded, “So I can sneak into the men’s locker room after rugby practice.”

Remus put his face in his hand.

Sirius chuckled. “Alright, favorite food?”

“Chocolate,” Remus said instantly.

“That’s not a food!”

“It is to me!” Remus responded smiling. “First kiss?”

“Shoot...um...I think it was Byron...Something...we were nine.”

“Wow, that’s young! You knew you liked boys that early?” Remus asked.

“Only one question, you’re cheating.” Sirius scolded. “My turn. What did you think when you first saw me?”

Remus took a moment, not because he couldn’t remember, but because he was embarrassed. “I thought...I thought you were the most gorgeous man I’d ever seen.”

“Wow.”

“Shut up.”

Sirius wiggled his eyebrows at Remus. “Your turn.”

“Fine. Why did you kiss me?”

“Because I thought the same thing,” Sirius replied quickly.

“You did not!” Remus snorted.

“How do you know what I think? Oh my gosh, next question, are you a psychic?” Sirius put a hand to his heart dramatically. 

“No, and really, why would you think that about me?”

“Because I did! I do! I remember thinking-- please, if there is a god, make this man gay and have a thing for incredibly sexy yet terribly insane blokes in leather jackets.”

Remus shook his head. “Well I guess the insanity explains it all then. Did you get dropped on your head a lot as a child?”

Sirius suddenly looked very...well serious. Biting his lip and furrowing his brow, he looked down at his lap.

“Er...sorry I…” Remus reached out and took one of Sirius’ hands. “Hey, it was just a joke.”

“I know,” Sirius said after a moment. “Sorry just...family, you know?”

Remus didn’t quite know, not yet, but he nodded his head and brushed his thumb soothingly across the back of Sirius’ hand. “Okay, how about last question before we walk back?”

“But, don’t you get an entire hour for lunch?”

“That’s your question?” Remus said, raising an eyebrow, “Well yes, I do, but I need to spend some of that time snogging you in a deserted alleyway.”

“Let’s go then!”

….

“Damn,” Remus said ask Sirius kissed along his neck. He needed to be back in a minute or James would have a fit. But he couldn’t stop kissing Sirius. Or touching him. Or thrusting his incredibly hard cock into Sirius’ leather-clad thigh. “We should’ve just skipped lunch and done this instead.”

“Mmm, I agree,” Sirius said, coming up for air before kissing Remus roughly, grabbing his hair and arse in tandem. 

“How am I supposed to go back to work like this?” Remus asked, panting as Sirius trailed his lips back to nibble his ear. 

“Well now you know how I felt after you left last time. Had to take a cold shower and everything,” Sirius replied.

“So this is revenge?” Remus chuckled, pushing Sirius back slightly so he could catch his breath. 

Sirius smiled devilishly at him. “Don’t pretend you don’t like it.”

“Who's pretending?” Remus said before looking down, blushing at the very obvious tent in his own trousers.

Sirius pressed close again, causing Remus to moan and grind into him once again, feeling the echoing hardness of Sirius’ clothed cock against his own. It was almost more than he could bear. 

“Sirius,” he pleaded, pushing the other man away gently.

“I know,” Sirius sighed, grabbing Remus’ hand and sagging against the wall beside him. 

“I’ll still get to see you Friday night, right?”

“Uh huh,” Remus said, trying to breathe and calm himself.

“So who all will be at the pub with us?”

“Well,” Remus counted, “There’s James and Peter--my roommates. And Lily. She’s a friend from art school, a sculptor. James has been trying to date her for years. Unsuccessfully I might add. But she still hangs out with us, so he thinks there’s hope.”

Sirius laughed. “He’s persistent then.”

“Mostly just insane. You’ll get along well.”

Sirius bumped his shoulder. “Hey!”

Remus bumped him back. “Thanks though, for coming out to lunch with me. More of a proper date than last time I guess.”

“I liked them both,” Sirius insisted, kissing Remus’ cheek. “I guess I’ll see you Friday then. Good luck with work.”

“You too,” Remus said, giving Sirius a quick hug before each went their separate way, waiting for Friday to arrive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Continued in Chapter 5  
> Comments/critique are appreciated, plus I'd love to make more Wolfstar friends <3


	5. Life Drawing 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Continued from Chapter 4  
> All HP characters belong to J.K. Rowling
> 
> Sorry I've taken so long on this one, I'm getting my cosplays ready for Yaoi Con and that's eaten away all my writing time!

_“I’m so sorry Remus,” Sirius said, the agony evident in his voice._

_“No that’s okay, it’s work. I get it.” And Remus did, though he was still disappointed._

_“It’s just, they can only do the shoot Friday night, and I’ve been wanting to book this brand for ages,” Sirius explained for the second time._

_“I know, I said it’s okay. We can hang out another night, I promise,” Remus said in what he hoped was a lighter tone than he currently felt. He’d been looking forward to this all week. Hanging out with Sirius--having no time constraints. And maybe even getting to spend more time with him after the pub if he was lucky._

_“Thanks for understanding Remus, I’ll call you tomorrow okay?”_

Remus sighed into his mug, remembering the conversation from yesterday and still feeling the sting of disappointment. Though it was Friday night and he was surrounded by his friends, it was not the same. He missed Sirius. 

“Remus? Remus!”

“Huh, oh sorry Lily,” Remus responded despondently. 

The vivacious redhead shook her head and wrapped an arm around him. “Come on cheer up. We’re really not so bad. I mean, I know we’re not leather-jacket wearing male supermodels but…”

“Hey, speak for yourself,” James said, puffing out his chest.

“That’s corderoy,” Lily sighed, “plus you have to be hot to be a model so…”

“Ouch,” said Peter, grinning over his beer. 

James feigned wounded pride and sulked into his pile of discarded peanut shells. 

“Don’t worry, you’ll have another chance to bring Sirius along to get scared off by James,” Lily offered.

“I know,” Remus said as James glared at him, “Not that mate! I just, really wanted to get to hang out with him again. I’m sorry for being such a wet blanket.”

“Just, try to cheer up mate. Hate seeing you down,” Peter said.

“Thanks. I’ve always just wanted to date someone who would get along with all my friends. So I was really hoping that he... you know?”

“We do. Don’t worry, next week we’ll get him out with us for sure,” Lily promised.

“As long as you’re sure he’s gay...can’t have anyone going after my Lily-kins,” James interjected.

“One: don’t ever call me that again if you’d like to keep all your teeth,” Lily sighed, looking to the heavens for patience. “Two: you do know he’s gay and after Remus right? That’s the point of all this?”

“Don’t even try Lil, he’s a lost cause,” Remus said, turning to face a pouting James. “What, you’re inventing impossible scenarios in your head and I’m the one whose being an emotional mess?”

“Lily just likes to make me jealous,” James beamed over at her as the redhead sighed for the uptenth time. 

“You two work this out amongst yourselves, I’m off to the toilets,” Remus said, stretching before exiting their booth. He chuckled as he left, shaking his head as James quickly took up his spot only to be swiftly pushed away by Lily.

Remus entered the restroom, waiting his turn as a couple of overly-masculine guys whose vocabulary was comprised mainly of ‘bro’ used the urinal ahead of him before washing his hands and exiting.

As remus took a single step out the door however, a beefy hand pressed it’s way none-too-gently into his chest. 

“Where the fuck are you going?” 

Remus blinked and didn’t even get a chance to respond as one of the rather large men from the restroom yelled at him before angrily shoving him back in. 

“Bro, this is the fag who was looking at our junk!”

“What?” Remus responded, holding his hands in front of himself as he took a step back toward the wall. He took a moment to wondering what the hell was going on as the bathroom door was held closed by one of three guys. 

“Dude, yeah, that’s the one,” one of the other guys said, “I heard him telling his stupid friends all about his boyfriend. Can’t believe they let fags into this place, can’t even take a piss in peace anymore with them around!”

“Look, I was just waiting in line, I honestly wasn’t looking at you!” Remus shouted, backing up as his initial adversary advanced upon him. Remus looked around, assessing the situation. One door, three drunk and belligerent homophobic muscleheads, and no other way out. Great. 

“Bro, let’s teach him a lesson,” Door-holding Bro suggested, cracking his knuckles. The man closest to Remus smiled dangerously. 

“Fuck yeah! Give him something to...” 

The man didn’t get a chance to finish. Without waiting to be told his fate, Remus ducked, kicked him in the kneecap, and rose to punch the second man squarely in the nose. The farthest guy stared, momentarily stunned before he was knocked off his feet by the door flying open to reveal Lily, followed closely by both James and Peter, holding beer bottles like swords. 

“Damn, guess you didn’t need our help,” Lily said with a cocky smile before kicking one of the men who attempted to rise, in the groin. 

“You’ll always be my knight in shining armor Lil,” Remus grinned, stepping over the two men at his feet. 

“Too bad I was late, I would’ve loved to watch you kick the shit out of them,” Lily said.

“She saw you get pushed back in the bathroom and…” James started before he was rudely interrupted. 

“Fucking fag and his fucking frie…” one of the men attempted to say before Lily stepped none too gently on his neck.

“Really? Do you really want to finish that sentence?”

“He’s not worth it Lil,” Remus sighed, exiting the bathroom and flexing his hand, realizing he may have bruised his knuckles. 

Lily draped an arm around James. “Yeah, but you know I can’t waste an opportunity to kick a man in the balls.”

James scooted away from her.

“Can we get out of here before there’s any more trouble though?” Peter asked, setting his bottle on the ground and quickly exiting the restroom before his friends. 

Remus let out a breath he hadn’t known he was holding as they left, shutting the door and walking purposefully away as quickly as possible without drawing attention. 

“Shit, Remus you’re shaking,” Lily said, grabbing him close.

“Sorry,” Remus said, realizing it at the same moment. “Probably the adrenaline. They jumped me really fast, I didn’t really have a chance to be scared.”

“Let’s get you home, okay?” James suggested and all agreed.

Remus nodded and they grabbed their coats before anyone could notice the men in the bathroom, downed the last of their drinks, and left to hail a cab. 

Lily rode home with them, keeping a close eye on Remus as he tried to shake off the incident and pretend that everything was okay. They opened some beers back at the flat and hung out until Lily had to call it a night and the other two trickled off to bed.

“You’re okay right Remus? You’d tell me if you needed me to stay over right?”

“Yeah, thanks Lily. I’ll be alright.”

“Okay,” she said, wrapping him in a tight hug. “Go call Sirius, I know you’re just dying to.”

Remus blushed and shrugged. “Maybe. Have a good night.”

Remus had his phone out within seconds of her shutting the door. Luckily Sirius answered on the second ring.

“Hey!” the other man sounded jubilant. “Perfect timing, I just got home. The shoot went so well, I can’t wait to show you the photos once they edit them!”

“That’s great,” Remus said, happy to hear Sirius’ voice.

“Is everything okay?” Sirius said, somehow sensing trouble. 

“Well...I...something happened at the bar tonight. I kind of got in a fight…”

“Wait what? Are you okay?” Sirius shouted as Remus held the phone away from his ear.

“Yeah, I mean, my knuckles hurt a bit, but nothing bad. You should see the other guys.”

“Wait, really? ‘Guys,’ plural?” Sirius asked in disbelief before Remus recounted the entire incident. 

“Wow. Okay I’m impressed. Stunned. A bit scared. But impressed,” Sirius admitted.

Remus chuckled. 

“But, are you really okay?” Sirius asked again.

“I think I’m a bit shaken up to be honest. But otherwise yeah,” Remus conceded. 

“Are you alright being alone? I mean, I know you have your roommates, but if you want to come over…” 

Remus thought for a moment before answering. He could sit alone and lonely on his couch, waiting for sleep to overtake him or... “Would...would that be alright? I mean, I know it’s late but…”

“Honestly, I’d rather you be here. With me.”

“Okay, let me call a cab.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Continued in Chapter 6  
> Comments/Critique welcome and I love making new Wolfstar friends!


	6. Life Drawing 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a wild fight with some homophobic bros at a pub, Remus doesn't want to be alone tonight. Sirius is glad to offer comfort and maybe more than a cup of tea to make him feel better

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for making you wait so long! I got bogged down with life and politics but realized being creative is what will keep me happy, so back to Wolfstar! This chapter is pure smut but I'll get more plot in next, I promise!

Remus wrung his hands as he stepped up to knock hesitantly on Sirius’ door. He knew Sirius was probably tired. It was well after midnight--Sirius had been working all day, and Remus’ sudden decision to visit was seeming like more of an imposition than he’d previously realized. Taking a deep breath, Remus let it out to condense in the chilly night air as he shook his head, worried that Sirius had perhaps collapsed into bed, and here he was, selfishly seeking Sirius’ attention when he should just suck it up and make his way to his own cold bed...err couch. 

Worrying his lip, Remus took another deep breath when the door before him opened suddenly, Sirius’ frame silhouetted in a soft warm glow.

“Sorry, I wasn’t sure I heard you,” he said, stepping aside to let Remus in. “Damn I’m glad you’re here,” Sirius sighed, running a hand over Remus shoulder before pulling him into a tight hug. 

Remus all but sank into the warm embrace. He had no idea how much he was in need of comfort, how much he was putting on a brave face until he was allowed to become completely undone. He nuzzled his face into Sirius’ shoulder, his eyes burning slightly as his fingers gripped the other man tightly. 

“Hey, it’s okay,” Sirius said softly, his hands moving in soothing circles on Remus’ back. “Come sit on the couch with me okay? We can have some tea.”

Nodding automatically, Remus reluctantly released his grip and followed Sirius down a short dark hallway to a cozy living room, complete with lit fireplace. “Let me just grab some mugs…” Sirius started before Remus burst out laughing. “What?” Sirius said, feigning affront as he twirled around in, what Remus could now see, was his fuzzy pink bathrobe.

“You’re just...so sexy,” Remus got out between his laughter.

“Don’t forget the slippers,” Sirius said, pointing his toes to show off his footwear.

“Are those...puppy slippers?” Remus almost choked.

“I’ll have you know this is the height of fashion. They’re wearing it everywhere, Milan, New York…”

“My gran’s bathroom…”

“Well, your gran has impeccable taste then,” Sirius huffed before winking at Remus and grabbing two cups of tea. “Besides, it’s not the robe that matters, it’s what’s under it.”

Remus swallowed hard. “And what’s under it?” he asked, his throat suddenly dry.

“You’ll just have to find out,” Sirius replied, his voice low as he settled gracefully beside Remus on the couch, one side of the fluffy pink material parting to reveal a very nude thigh. 

Remus bit his bottom lip. “Okay, I officially love your robe.”

“See?” Sirius countered, falling back slightly against the arm of the couch, the heat of his gaze settled on Remus. “I knew you had good taste.”

“Did you wear all this just to distract me?” Remus said, his gaze wavering between Sirius’ deep grey eyes and his perfect exposed skin.

Sirius shrugged and the robe slipped off one incredibly toned shoulder. “It worked, didn’t it?”

“I...it’s really hard to carry on a conversation with you like that.”

“Like what?” Sirius asked, his eyes full of mischief.

“You know ‘like what,’” Remus gestured. “Barely clothed…”

“We don’t have to talk then,” Sirius replied, his long neck exposed as he cocked his head to one side.

Remus bit his bottom lip. Sirius was obviously doing this to him on purpose. But for the life of him he couldn’t come up with a single reason to hold back. So before he could over think his actions Remus all but launched himself across the couch, his knees bent to either sides of Sirius’ hips, his arms caged around the other man’s head as he looked down. Sirius was so beautiful. For the life of him, Remus still could not fathom why this stunningly perfect man could possibly desire him, but inexplicably he did. Remus decided to stop thinking.

Lowering himself on his elbows, Remus crushed his lips to Sirius’, the rightness of their connection drawing a small moan from his throat. This strange spark between them was quickly bursting into a full blown fire, one which Remus could not help but fan. Sirius moved against him, long fingers reaching up to tangle in his hair, moving over the shell of his ear and smoothing over his neck in the most erotic of touches. Everything about this felt so incredibly right.

“We’ll go however fast or slow you want, alright?” Sirius said, breaking away momentarily, his eyes searching Remus’ as his chest heaved between words. 

“I want whatever you’ll give me,” Remus said unthinkingly, unsure even what he was asking as he dove in for another kiss. All he knew was that he was going to cherish this time with Sirius for the rest of his life, so he’d take what he could and be grateful. Sirius nodded against his lips, a small smile touching them that Remus felt through the heat of their kiss. 

Knowing that pretty much everything Sirius had done so far was an act of seduction, Remus had no qualms about taking this opportunity to explore every inch of Sirius that he so longed to touch. His mouth roamed along Sirius’ jawline, down his neck, which arched into his touch, his pulse rapid and frantic below Remus’ lips. Slipping his fingers from Sirius’ hair to coast down his sides, Remus pushed past the robe to touch bare, perfect skin with just the tips of his fingertips, eliciting a shudder and gasp from the man beneath him. 

“You really are perfect,” Remus murmured into his neck, his breath lightly caressing the sensitive skin. With on hand he reached to push the robe aside from Sirius’ chest, sitting up slightly to admire his smooth sculpted pecs and the top of slightly defined abs. 

“I know,” Sirius teased with a wink, “Or at least that’s what I thought until I saw you.”

“You don’t have to…”

“No, I mean it. Really,” Sirius said, taking Remus’ chin between his thumb and forefinger. “The things you do to me…”

“Like what?” Remus asked breathlessly, his fingers boldly stroking down Sirius chest to play with a hardened nipple.

“Damn...Remus,” Sirius arched into his touch. “Well you know I couldn’t face you while you were drawing me.”

“You never did tell me why that was,” Remus teased, though he was pretty sure he had an idea.

Sirius’ hands reached up to grip Remus by the hip bones, rubbing softly before pulling Remus down until he was seated on his lap. Canting his hips, Sirius pressed the steel length of his erection sharply against Remus’ own as a whole list of expletives left his lips. “Fuck you make me so hard Remus!”

Remus could do nothing but moan and rock against the other man, overcome with so much need he wasn’t sure how he had not come in his trousers already. With closed eyes he savored every sensation, every detail. He spread his legs wider, pressing forward with another moan, so overcome that Sirius was just as hard as he was, that Sirius wanted him. 

“Hey,” Sirius said, snapping him back as Remus opened his eyes. Arms encircled Remus to pull his face back down to meet Sirius’ hungry kiss as they continued to rut against one another. 

“So you couldn’t even look at me...without...without…” Remus breathed.

“Without getting so fucking hard I wanted to jump off that podium, rip your clothes off and fuck you in the middle of class? Yeah,” Sirius supplied.

“Damn,” Remus groaned. “Is that...is that what you want now?”

“I want you to do everything with me that you’ve ever dreamt of Remus,” Sirius said softly.

“But this isn’t just about me,” Remus said, frowning slightly. “What do you like? What are your favorite things to do with...with a man.”

“Well doing this with you has just shot to the top of my list,” Sirius said with a smirk, “But I like other things too...getting off with a guy, our cocks rubbing together. Or bottoming, I like that too, but only if a guy has a really big cock.”

Remus looked at his incredulously. 

“No really, it feels so good, but my prostate is really far back or something so if a guy has a small dick…”

Sirius stopped when he saw Remus turn beet red and look down, wringing his hands into the fabric of the couch. “Shit I mean...Remus it’s okay. I like you no matter what, even if you’re sma...er I mean not really big or…shit.”

Remus continued to avert his eyes and tried to remember to breath. Strong fingers touched his chin lightly before exerting more pressure, turning his face back to Sirius. 

“Look, Remus, I fell for you okay? Not what’s in your pants. I’m just making a mess of things, I’m sorry, alright? I mean, I want you no matter what.”

Remus took a deep breath before he could meet Sirius’ gaze. “Even if I have a micro penis?” 

“A...a what?” Sirius asked, the look of shock on his face almost making Remus break his stoic facade.

“A micro…” Remus started but couldn’t help but break out in laughter. 

“Okay, wait, are you having me on?” Sirius asked, relief causing him to take a deep breath. 

“Yeah, sorry couldn’t help it,” Remus replied. “I’m not...I mean the reason I was embarrassed wasn’t cause...er….wait do I feel small?”

“What? Well no, but I it’s not like I’ve gotten to see…” Sirius said with a rakish grin.

Emboldened, Remus sat back slightly, pressing his cock against Sirius and biting his lip. “Maybe you...you know, could check then?”

Sirius shook his head and smiled. “Damn you keep on surprising me.” He reached up, grasping Remus’ sweater and tugging on it, a signal Remus took to pull it over his head. But when Sirius reached for his button-up shirt beneath, Remus stilled his hands. 

“Do you mind if I leave it on? I just…”

“Of course,” Sirius said quickly, instead reaching for the fly of Remus’ trousers. “This alright though?”

“Well you do have to check,” Remus said matter-of-factly, though inside he was shaking with a mixture of nerves and pent up longing. A few days before he had never even kissed a man and now...now… Remus took a deep breath. He wanted this, wanted Sirius so badly. Nothing else mattered. Not his inexperience, not his past, and even if he only had tonight, he was going to take it. 

With swift fingers Sirius lowered Remus’ fly then pulled the loosened trousers down over his hips to bunch around his thighs. Remus sat on his knees in just his boxer briefs, reminding himself to breath, not daring to look at Sirius’ face quite yet. Soft fingertips edged around his underwear before dipping ever-so-slightly inside, a tentative quest so unlike Sirius’ bold actions. 

“Remus,” Sirius said, “I’m not going any further until you look me in the eye.”

This was nothing, Remus told himself. Sirius had probably done this with a lot of guys...damn that was not what he wanted to think about. But he could do this. He needed some of Sirius’ confidence right about now. 

Letting out the breath he hadn’t even realized he held, Remus glanced up to Sirius. “Are you going to tease me all night or what?”

Sirius’ eyes lit up as he grinned. “Your wish is my command.” With fingers ready on each side of the waistband, Sirius gripped the garment before sliding it over and down to rest with the fabric already gathered about his thighs.

“Holy shit,” Sirius said reverently, his brows furrowing as he bit his lower lip. “Remus, you deserve a religion or something to worship that thing.”

Remus blushed and crossed his arms over his chest, unsure what else to do. Anatomy was anatomy, and he wasn’t going to take credit for his genetics by saying thank you. He was, without a doubt, well endowed. But it really didn’t mean much as, until now, he had only had his own hand for company. 

“Remus?” Sirius said, meeting his eyes. “What are you thinking?”

“You know, that first thing you mentioned liking? I think...I think I want to try that tonight,” Remus replied.

“Damn,” Sirius said, his mouth going dry. “Hell yes to that. Maybe you should take your pants off all the way though.”

Nodding Remus swung a leg over Sirius, standing quickly and facing away from the other man to shimmy his trousers and underwear to the floor. Turning back, he took in the incredible view. Sirius looked completely debauched, passion marks littered his long neck, his robe open across the chest and one knee bent, a long slender leg displayed through the slit in the fabric which barely hid what still lay to discover. Remus could feel his cock twitch in longing and looked down to see a bead of cum darken the fabric of the shirt that partially hid him from view. He groaned and averted his eyes back to Sirius. 

“Come here,” Sirius beckoned and Remus quickly complied. How could he possibly resist?

Straddling the other man once more, Remus towered over Sirius, his eyes resting hungrily on the knot tying the other man’s robe in place. Swallowing once, Remus met Sirius’ eyes as his fingers found the cloth, shaking only slightly as they sought to pull it open. Luckily it was barely tied and Remus took only a moment to throw both it and the sides of the robe open. 

Damn, he thought, his eyes devouring the incredible sight that was Sirius’ erection. He was completely smooth, his heavy cock jutting forth to curve up into a reddened crown that almost kissed his belly button. Just like the rest of Sirius, his cock was indescribably perfect. Remus knew his cheeks were flushed as Sirius reached out, moving his shirt to the side to expose him. Remus’ erection gave a twitch and a bead of precum slipped forth to bead at the tip then slide down his length. 

“Remus,” Sirius said, causing his eyes to jump guiltily back. Remus realized he hadn’t said a word and Sirius was probably waiting...but no. The hungry look Sirius sported seemed to echo his own as the other man looked from his groin to his eyes. “Either kiss me or fuck me, cause there’s no way I’m lasting long.”

Remus could not agree more. With one--hopefully--smooth movement, he pinned his knees to Sirius’ hips, canting forward as his lips sought the other man. The moment he felt his cock slide deliciously against Sirius’ own almost had him coming undone. The heat of the other man, the slow glide of soft skin juxtaposed with hard, willing flesh was more overwhelming than he could ever have imagined. Remus rutted against him, legs spread wide, pressing himself wantonly against Sirius from above, gasping and moaning out incoherent thoughts of yes and please and more. 

“Touch me,” Sirius coaxed, grabbing Remus’ hand to guide him to their cocks as they pressed together against his stomach. 

“Oh gods, Sirius,” Remus sighed, his fingers grasping tight to the hard flesh beneath, his own cock forgotten in his need to finally feel this other man in his hand. He glided his fingers up, worshiping the flesh, gripping it with just the right amount of pressure as he pulled and coaxed him towards orgasm. With his thumb he found the tip, kneading the sensitive slit beneath Sirius’ cockhead until the other man moaned his name over and over, bucking his hips up to grind against Remus. Sirius threw his head to the side, his robe wide open to expose himself, and Remus ducked down to gently bite one nipple between his teeth. He had absolutely no idea what he was doing, but that didn’t seem to matter to Sirius as he fucked himself unabashedly into Remus’ closed fist.

“Wait,” Sirius finally got out, his chest heaving as his long hair wildly framed his face. “I want...us to come...together,” he said, pressing their heavy cocks against one another, Sirius’ smaller one bumping his own as they laced their fingers in a tight grip. 

“I’m not...not going to last,” Remus stuttered. He’d been dreaming of this his entire life, not to mention how it had recently occupied his thoughts in the shower each morning since he’d met Sirius. What it would be like to touch him, to finally have him naked, to press against him, to take and give pleasure with another man as he had always wished. And now, it couldn’t be any more perfect. 

“Kiss me,” Sirius demanded, and Remus fell into his embrace, lips bruising in their neediness as their hands jerked their leaking cocks towards completion. Sirius kissed like a god. His tongue was so deft, it coaxed every inch of longing from Remus as they moaned into one another’s open mouths. 

“Remus, I’m...almost…” Sirius started, and Remus could feel the other man tremble beneath him. They were both so close. And he wanted to see this moment. Pushing away, Remus arched his back so he was situated over the other man’s thighs as he rubbed himself against Sirius’s hard cock over and over. Precum trickled from his slit, slicking both their hands and mingling with Sirius’ own in a wet mess that he longed to lap up with his tongue. He wanted to taste all of Sirius. To take Sirius in his mouth, to devour his cock…

With that illicit thought Remus pressed sharply forward with a moan, shouting Sirius’ name as cum shot forth from his cockhead, splattering the other man’s belly in a sticky wash as he continued to stroke their lengths together. 

“Fuck yes!” Sirius shouted, his hips digging into Remus as he arched his back, coming all over their hands, cum dripping off Remus’ cock as their fingers gripped one another tightly for a last pull. With shaky hands, Remus loosened his grip, his chest tight and his breath coming in uneven gasps as his heart attempted to seek a normal rhythm. 

“That was, without a doubt,” Sirius gasped, “the hottest thing I’ve ever seen in my life.”

Remus ducked his head and blushed as he wiped his fingers on his shirt. 

“Come here please?” Sirius asked, holding his arms open. Remus smiled and slid forward, nestling into the space between the couch and Sirius’ side, his head coming to rest on Sirius’ shoulder. 

“Tell me you’ll stay the night?” Sirius asked. Remus had no idea why the other man seemed so desperate for him but he was not about to question it now. 

“I hope you have a bed, cause I’m quite over sleeping on couches,” Remus smiled as Sirius laughed. 

“It’s king-sized. Lots of room.”

“Are you sure there’s room enough for both of us AND your ego?” Remus chuckled.

“Hey!” Sirius feigned resentment, “You’ll regret that when I’m sleeping soundly on my memory foam mattress and you’re shivering down here…”

“Memory foam? I’m sorry, I repent! Your ego is very...nice? Well endowed? Luxurious?” Remus teased.

“Well now, that’s better,” Sirius said, holding Remus closer, smiling as they curled up contentedly together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wanted to give a shout out, the "worshiping" is a reference to one of my favorite smutty Wolfstar fics, Size Matters by REwrites24, check it out if you haven't already, it's so hot


	7. Life Drawing 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After an incredible night of pleasure with Sirius, Remus awakens full of hope but his insecurities over his scars quickly get the better of him.
> 
> More cuddles, nude drawing, and fluffy pink robes to follow!

Remus awoke wrapped in the warmest embrace on the most comfortable mattresses and decided in that moment that he would never leave Sirius’ bed. Strong arms held him tight, pulling Remus’ clothed torso flush to the hard planes of Sirius’ chest as the other man breathed evenly onto the back of his neck. Remus had never felt so content.

Fuzzy memories of the night before soon resolved themselves into sharp focus and he smiled, blushing slightly as he recalled how it had felt to be with Sirius, to touch him, to make him come in his hand. He would never forget this. 

With a small sigh Remus nestled back into Sirius’ body, placing one of his hands back to rest on the other man’s naked hip. His mind turned to mush as sleep began to take hold once more and the faint grey of predawn receded behind his closed eyes.

Soft yellow dawn drove back the shadows as Remus stirred awake once again. His eyelids fluttered, attempting to focus his still bleary eyes as he felt soft fingers caress him. One hand made its way tantalizing around his upper thigh, the other up under his shirt, tracing his stomach before suddenly stopping, stiffening…

Remus gasped and pulled away, crossing his arms over his shirt and holding it down to hide his body as best he could. In the grip of horror and embarrassment, Remus sprung from the side of the bed, searching frantically for the remainder of his clothes as a raspy voice caught his attention.

“Please, Remus come back,” Sirius pleaded.

“Sorry I have to go,” Remus replied without looking back, knowing it would be his undoing. If he did, Sirius could break his heart. “It’s been...I mean thank you...I just…”

A warm hand grasped his wrist softly, so loose that he could easily break free if he wished. The rustle of sheets to Remus’ side indicated that Sirius has moved to the edge of the bed. Remus looked away but somehow couldn’t bring himself to leave quite yet. 

“I forgot. I didn’t mean to...Remus please, just...just don’t leave.”

Sirius sounded so forlorn that Remus couldn’t help but meet his eyes. Then he was lost. The raw emotion swirling in those grey depths just about undid him and Remus fell forward into Sirius’ surprised arms. 

“It’s okay,” Sirius said softly, his hands stroking soothly in Remus’ hair. “I’m sorry, I really was just sleepy and wanted to touch you. It was so perfect waking up next to you, I didn’t mean…”

“No it’s...it’s alright,” Remus said into his shoulder, taking a steadying breath before pulling back and meeting the other man’s eyes. “I should've been more careful. This is why you...you were my first. I just couldn’t risk it.”

“Risk what? Remus whatever it is, I don’t think it’s as bad as you’re leading on.”

“For someone, you especially, to see. It’s...it’s disgusting,” Remus said, swallowing past the emotion threatening to burst forth. Damn, this was harder than he’d thought. He should never have stayed the night, never have fallen for Sirius, never dared to hope that he could have someone who would care about him. Because once they saw…

“Look, if it’s scars…” Sirius stopped when Remus’ eyes widened. “That’s what I felt when I touched you right?” Remus nodded and Sirius let out a sigh. “They don’t bother me, really Remus, why would I let a little thing like that…”

Remus winced. “They’re not little...there’s a lot. It’s...hideous.”

Sirius set his face determinedly, his gaze unwavering on Remus as he held him by the shoulders. “Remus. I. Don’t. Bloody. Care. Scars, no scars, they don’t make a bit of difference to me. Now stop trying to find a reason to run away!”

Remus sat there stunned. Was he...could he have been looking for an excuse to run off before getting hurt, not even giving Sirius a chance to actually accept him? He was so disgusted with his own body, not even willing to glance upon himself in the mirror, but could someone else not see the same flaws he did? Or overlook them as he had never been able to? He was so overwhelmingly biased about his self-hatred that he had never even considered that someone, someone so kind and open like Sirius, might be able to look past his scars.

“Okay,” Remus said softly, his throat tight as he looked down, his hands clenched in a death grip to the hem of his shirt. 

“Do you believe me thought?” Sirius asked and Remus nodded after a moment.

“I believe you think that now…” he replied.

Sirius let out an exasperated noise and threw back his head. “Then show me! I’m not going to gasp in horror and run! Give me some credit Remus!”

“Look, I’m trying, it’s just not that easy for me.”

“I want to help. Please let me?”

Remus arched his head back, looking at the ceiling as he swallowed his pain, his eyes clenched shut. He didn’t know if he could do this. To be this open and honest with someone. Of course James knew about his scars, had seen them when they were boys. But it wasn’t the same. Sirius was someone new, someone who hadn’t cared about him long enough that scars wouldn’t change anything. He could just picture it, the disgust, the revulsion at his marred skin. How Sirius would try to be polite, how he would instead back away slowly, make an excuse, force him to leave. He’d stop calling, stop texting. Then simply not answer his door one day. And up until that point Remus would hold out that last bit of hope that someone could look past his scars--that someone would give him a chance. 

He sighed and closed his eyes. “Sirius I can’t.”

The reassuring weight of a warm hand closed about his own. Long fingers intertwined to squeeze his. 

“Okay,” Sirius said softly. “But I just want you to know, I’m not going anywhere.” Sirius grabbed Remus and pulled him back on the bed so their backs were to the headboard. He softly kissed the side of Remus’ neck and held him tight. Remus folded into the embrace as he held it in his memory, wondering once again how long such a good thing could possibly last for someone like him.

...oo0O0oo…

For reasons inexplicable to Remus, Sirius seemed neither tired of nor disgusted by him, even after a month of dating. They saw one another three to four times a week, depending on Sirius’ modeling schedule and Remus’ school and job. And even if he was too busy for a date, as happened today, Sirius loved to show up at the coffee shop just in time for Remus’ lunch break. 

The two men sat outside, enjoying a rare bit of sunshine, holding hands across the table as they shared a croissant sandwich. 

“So…” Sirius drawled as he stroked his fingers against Remus’ own, “any other dashingly good looking men been modeling for you lately?”

Remus shook his head. Though he seemed cocky, there was a layer of insecurity to Sirius’ confidence that Remus found charming. “It’s been all girls lately. A bloke two weeks before, but not quite my type,” he said casually. Before Sirius could pout he continued. “He was about sixty and very married. I don’t need that type of competition.”

Laughing Sirius sat back in his chair. “Okay okay, I’ll stop being jealous. But what if--say tomorrow--a hot guy was to model for you?”

“I don’t know,” Remus pretended to contemplate, “I suppose you could both compete in a series of trials for my affection…” Sirius’ bottom lip began to quiver dramatically.

“You think just anyone could fill my fuzzy pink bathrobe?” he asked.

Remus shrugged and feigned indifference.

“Whatever will it take for you to appreciate me?” Sirius sighed and smiled mischievously.

...ooO0Ooo…

Nothing was going Remus’ way today. He’d woken up to a broken hot water heater, a fact he only figured out once he’d stepped into the shower and doused himself in a frigid spray of ice. When he had finally thawed out and was ready for some breakfast, Remus then discovered that his flatmates had eaten all his nutella, and then to top it all off, there was a spider in his shoe. What else could go wrong? Oh only the fact that construction had all but halted his morning commute to Uni and he couldn’t seem to find a single parking space near the art building. Finally, two minutes before the start of class, he saw a car pulling out of a spot as he looped around for the fifth time. Perfect.

After parking, Remus took a deep breath and craned his head back for a moment, closing his eyes before grabbing his sketchpad and art box and opening the door. A clunk drew his eyes to the rear of the car. He sighed. What else could possibly go wrong? he wondered in annoyance. 

“Excuse me,” a rather familiar voice said as Remus turned to find an incredibly gorgeous man in a rather pink robe lounging gracefully across the boot of the car. 

“Let me guess,” Remus said with a small smile, his earlier tribulations forgotten, “you’re lost?”

“Hopelessly,” Sirius breathed dramatically. 

Remus leaned over, his nose a scant span from Sirius’ own. “You’re going to make me late.”

“You mean ‘us’ late,” Sirius said, arching his neck to take Remus’ lips in firm acquisition.

“I guess class can’t exactly start without a model,” Remus said breathily as they finally broke away, Sirius’ hand tangled in his sandy hair.

“Tell me you’re happy to see me?” Sirius asked, gently biting Remus’ bottom lip.

“You don’t even know how much...the day I’ve had until now…” Remus said softly, kissing Sirius once more. Sirius smiled and kissed him back before nimbly jumping from the car to the ground. The soft pink fabric opened at his legs each time he took a step and Remus couldn’t help but blush.

“So, are you really going to pose naked for me this time?” he asked hesitantly.

“Are you kidding?” Sirius chuckled, “There’s no way I’d be able to keep from...well...you know. Anyway, when Professor Sinistra asked me to model again, I told her I could, but that I was dating someone in the class and wanted to keep covered. Modesty and all.”

“Ah, yes, you’ve always been the picture of modesty,” Remus said, poking Sirius in the ribs. 

“Don’t worry darling, “Sirius drawled in a fake southern accent, “I shan't bare myself to prying eyes.” 

Remus rolled his own eyes as they walked into the classroom. 

“Oh I saved you a seat,” Sirius said, pointing to a stool with a pair of puppy slippers perched upon it. 

Remus sighed and shook his head as Sirius chuckled and walked over to the professor, leaving Remus to relocate his tacky slippers to the floor and unpack his supplies. 

“Now class,” Professor Sinistra said after a minute as everyone began to settle in. “You all remember our model Sirius.” Remus looked around and by all the blushing and almost imperceptible sighing, he was fairly certain that everyone did. “Per request, Sirius will not be nude today,” a couple groans erupted and Remus chuckled, “but this will give all of you a good opportunity to practice drawing folds of cloth. We’ll begin as soon as Sirius has taken his first pose.”

Draped in either his robe or cascading fabrics, Sirius stood still for pose after pose until finally the two hours were up. Remus looked down at his sketchpad, smiling just a bit at how well he was able to capture Sirius’ hair as it fell about his shoulders or his toned thigh as it peaked from the confines of his hideous robe. A couple of classmates began to wander over to take a look at his work and show Remus their own.

“I swear you could teach the class,” a brunette said to Remus’ right.

“Remus could you tutor me?” a young redhead asked. 

“Oh and me!” came a chorus of requests. Remus ducked his head shyly and began to put away his supplies, thanking everyone politely but informing them that he didn’t have the time or skill.

“So modest,” a deep voice said as Remus looked up to find Sirius had made his way into the group. 

Remus smiled and raised his head. “I hear you’re an expert on it.”

Sirius smirked and reached out a hand, catching Remus chin between his fingers and leaning in close. 

“Unless you want to see my possessive side,” he said, his voice a low growl, “I suggest you follow me. I hate to share.”

Remus swallowed and nodded slightly. Sirius released his hold and gave him a suggestive stare before grabbing Remus’ wrist and tugging him away. Blushing furiously at the gawking onlookers, Remus followed Sirius down a hallway away from the class.

“Umm Sirius?” Remus stammered as Sirius ground to a halt outside the teacher’s aid office. Sirius yanked open the door and Remus spied a small desk, chair, and a bag with Sirius’ street clothes stuffed inside. Pulling Remus inside, Sirius slammed the door behind them and before he knew what was happening, Remus found himself pinned to the door with Sirius sucking hard at his neck. 

“Oh!” Remus moaned, tilting his neck to one side as Sirius claimed him. His long, charcoal-covered fingers reached up to run along Sirius’ jaw and up to clutch strands of ink-black hair. 

“Damn it, you don’t even realize…” Sirius breathed against his sensitive neck.

“What?” Remus asked, his eyes glassy with longing.

“How irresistible you are. To me. To everyone.”

Remus shook his head and tried to lean in for a kiss but Sirius pulled back.

“You really don’t realize how much they want you?”

Furrowing his brow, Remus gave Sirius a puzzled look. “I think you’re seeing things. Maybe you can borrow James’ glasses.”

Sirius shook his head and pulled Remus close. “Maybe I should just be grateful,” he said, nuzzling Remus’ neck below his ear. Remus sighed into his touch, melting to Sirius’ body as the other man’s tongue slowly licked along the side of his ear. Dark smudges from his fingers marked Sirius at every stretch of skin he touched, each fold of fabric he clutched as low moans left his mouth. 

“Damn I want you,” Sirius murmured as his hands raked down Remus body to top of his jeans. 

“Wait, here?” Remus’ eyes opened wide but he didn’t make a move to push Sirius away.

Sirius made a low sound in his throat before shoving a leg between Remus’ own. All the breath left Remus’s lungs as Sirius’ muscular thigh pressed up against his balls, rocking rhythmically. He barely felt the rough wood against his back as Sirius crowded against him, moving in to claim his mouth forcefully. 

“It’s torture watching you for hours when I can’t even touch you,” Sirius said in a low voice, his fingers tracing the waistband of Remus’ jeans before popping open the button. 

“I…” Remus stammered, “I want you too. It feels like I’m touching you every time my pencil traces your body. I get so…”

“Do you get hard for me?” Sirius asked when Remus couldn’t finish. Remus nodded against his neck. It was still so difficult for him to express himself. He wanted Sirius, but to make the first move, to voice his desires and possibly face rejection...Remus still didn’t dare.

“When you draw me, do you visualize me naked?” Sirius asked. Remus nodded again. “Do you picture my cock, hard and eager for you?” Pressing himself firmly to Remus’ own crotch, there was no mistaking Sirius’ erection through the fabric of his robe. Remus opened his eyes and looked down to see the tented fabric rubbing against him. It was almost too much to bear. Strong fingers worked between their bodies, pressing against Remus’ cock, a thumb rubbing the tip through the strained denim. He let out a groan that probably could be heard through the door. Remus no longer could find it in himself to care. 

Those fingers left him feeling unfulfilled momentarily as Sirius took a small step back and yanked down Remus’ zipper. He made quick work of Remus’s trousers and boxer briefs, pulling them to pool at his ankles. 

“I need to suck you,” Sirius said in a low voice, looking into the other man’s amber eyes. Remus swallowed and reached down to grab the base of his leaking cock, grasping it firmly before he came on the spot. His chest heaved and his balls felt so tight he could barely stand up straight. Releasing himself, Remus let the air out of his lungs and kissed Sirius once more, hungrily. Sirius broke away grinning before sinking to his knees. Pink fabric billowed around him as his back hair flowed over his sharp collarbones, dark grey eyes looking up at Remus in pure lust. 

Then he leaned forward, reddened lips slowly moving to take in Remus’ thick length. Reaching down, Remus tangled his fingers in Sirius’ hair, pinning it from the other man’s face so he could watch the erotic display below. Sirius kept his eyes open, hungrily taking in Remus’ cock as he swallowed him further, one hand reaching up to knead his balls softly against his palm. Bringing his hand to his mouth, Remus bit down on the back of it to suppress a gasp of pleasure. Sirius’ enthusiasm seemed to take hold as he began to move back and forth, his head bobbing over Remus’ straining cock, taking as much in as he possibly could fit in his mouth, his tongue lapping the underside and causing Remus to buck his hips fitfully. Jolts of pure lust seemed to take hold of his entire body, originating at the juncture of Sirius’ hot mouth sucking maddening on him. 

The soft rustle of fabric drew Remus’ eyes lower, down to where Sirius had flung open his robe, one hand furiously working his own cock. Pink fabric framed the glistening head as milky drops of precum dripped from the swollen tip, lubricating his hand as he yanked himself demandingly. Remus watched Sirius’ hips bucking into his own firm grasp, watched as Sirius spread his thighs wider as he moaned around his mouthful. He could not take much more of this.

“Oh Sirius,” he groaned, his hips pressing insistently forward, shoving his cock deeper into Sirius’ mouth. Sirius moaned back in reply, the pressure building as he pleasured himself. 

“Shit, I’m gunna…” Remus started but Sirius claimed his cock, sucking him hard and deep, causing Remus to stiffen as his entire body contracted in orgasm. He pumped into Sirius’ mouth, wet lips caressing his engorged cock in a perfect symphony of pressure and movement. Remus felt himself come down Sirius’ throat before the other man had to pulled back and swallow, lust-filled eyes gazing up at him. 

Amber eyes lowered in a haze of lust as he leaned heavily against the door, Remus watched as Sirius licked his lips and glance down at himself. Sirius had to be mere moments from coming, his long thick length was so engorged and leaking as his strong fingers grasped and tugged, his mouth slack and swollen from Remus’ cock. Sirius reached his free hand beneath his robe, slick fingers pressing up and firmly into his hole, stretching him open as he bucked once, twice, then came in a rush, come splashing the floor between Remus’ spread legs. Once he had ceased moaning and rocking into his own fist, Sirius reached a hand up to Remus thigh. In a boneless mass, Remus sank to the floor beside him, back to the door, and pulled Sirius into his lap. 

“Fuck that was amazing,” Sirius said breathlessly as he rested his head on Remus’ shoulder.

“I hope you let me return the favor next time,” Remus replied, emboldened by their actions. Spoken softly into his neck, Remus heard the echo of words he’d once spoken to Sirius. 

“I’ll take whatever you’ll give me.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus and Sirius have been dating for a month and then there was plot

That night, like so many nights lately, Sirius had convinced Remus to stay over at his flat. Not that it was a tough decision for Remus. Sleeping on a lumpy couch in his friend’s living room or waking up in the arms of a beautiful model. Kind of a no-brainer. 

Remus had just finished brushing his teeth when Sirius walked in to do the same. He rolled his eyes as Sirius squeezed a giant gob of toothpaste out and proceeded to brush his teeth like a rabid animal.

‘You know, the tube says you only need a pea-sized amount…” Remus began before a frothing Sirius cut in.

“Bruuut my teef feel so ‘uch ‘ore keen ‘ike dis,” he spat around a mouthful of bubbles.

Sighing, Remus pushed Sirius’ shoulder playfully. “I guess you’re the model so I shouldn’t judge.”

“Damn right,” Sirius said after spitting and rinsing. His eyes turned to Remus as he began to pack his toothbrush into his overnight bag.

“You know, you can just leave that here,” Sirius said softly, tilting his chin toward Remus’ toothbrush.

“Huh?” Remus blinked, a bit taken aback.

‘Your toothbrush,” he said in an overly nonchalant way, “just leave it. And a hairbrush, razor...whatever you need.”

“Oh,” Remus said, blushing just a bit. “I...alright I will. Thank you,” he said, grabbing Sirius from behind in a tight hug. Sirius just shrugged like it was no big deal, and maybe it wasn’t to him, but to Remus it was everything. A wonderful security settled over him, a feeling of belonging that he had not felt in a very long time. He held Sirius close, not talking, just resting his head against the other man’s back as he lingered in the warmth and comfort Sirius instilled.

“What about pajamas?” Remus asked into Sirius’ ear before the other man turned to wrap him in his arms.

“Ha! You even think of wearing clothes in my bed and the deal’s off,” Sirius replied, grabbing Remus and pushing him toward said bed, laughing as they fell together on the soft sheets.

...oooOO0OOooo…

That Friday saw them all at the pub together. Remus and Sirius arrived first, followed by James, who had luckily taken to Sirius like they had been best mates since grade school. Both had their arms around one another’s shoulders and two beers in them by the time Peter arrived and Lily soon followed, sitting as far from James as possible. Knowing not to ask, Remus kept quiet, sure that with a couple drinks in her, Lily was likely to spill all and put James in his rightful place. 

Luckily Sirius had recommended a new bar near his place, seeing as Remus was not exactly keen to return to the pub where his rather homophobic run-in had occurred a month back. Overall the place seemed like it would work out fine. Being rather new it was impeccably clean, within walking distance of both their flats, and above all else, no one batted an eye when Remus and Sirius put their arms around one another. It had a sleek gastropub feel to it, bare bulb lighting, lots of metal everywhere and succulents on the tables. 

“Just admit it mate, you’re a hipster,” James said, elbowing Sirius.

“What? Why I never! Take it back Sir James, or there’ll be pistols at dawn!” Sirius replied dramatically.

“What’s a hipster?” Peter asked, looking confused. “Like a hippie...sister?”

“Yes Pete, can’t you see my flower crown through all my girlish good looks?” Sirius batted his eyes.

Peter blinked owlishly and turned bright red.

“Oh don’t flirt with him, you’ll make Remus jealous,” James sighed, pushing Sirius into his boyfriend.

“You can have him Pete, I swear, here I thought I’d finally snagged myself a man and I got a hippie sister instead.”

Sirius pouted until Remus sighed and kissed him quickly on the cheek, leading to a bout of “eews” and “yucks” from their overly dramatic friends. 

“Next round’s on you two for all the PDA,” James said, signaling their waiter. 

“Damn it, who made that rule?” Sirius said.

“The man without a girlfriend,” Lily snorted, glaring at James.

“Uh oh,” Remus whispered to Sirius, “here it comes…”

“Lily, I said I was…”

“Can it Potter. When I tell you I’m going to march on International Women’s Day and you say ‘Why, you don’t need the exercise?’ you’re not being funny!” she yelled.

“Shit,” Sirius said, eyes wide as he leaned back.

“Okay but…” James started.

“No no ‘but’s! I don’t know why I need to explain this to you!” Lily seethed, crossing her arms.

“Look, it was a stupid joke but I don’t know why you’re taking it so seriously! It’s not a big deal, at least it shouldn’t be, or is this something every guy just knows?” James looked pleadingly at his male friends.

“She’s marching for equality James,” Remus started.

“Women still don’t get equal pay for doing the same jobs as men you know,” Sirius chimed in.

“Do you think the government should have any say in what a woman does with her body James?” Peter finished.

“Wow,” said James, eyes wide as he looked between them.

“Yeah, they get it,” Lily said triumphantly, nodding at her three friends. 

‘Okay, right...I didn’t think about it like that.”

“No, you didn’t,” Lily said. “And that’s just the tip of the iceberg, but if you’re going to be with me James, you need to show some respect.”

“‘Be with you’?” James echoed in slight shock.

“Oh...I didn’t mean…” Lily looked down at her drink in hopes that the conversation would go away. Instead her friends did. 

“So, Pete, Sirius, help me get some shots?” Remus pleaded, his eyes darting to James as he gestured subtally to Lily. James eagerly took the hint as the three left quickly for the bar and Remus hoped they could patch things up between them and maybe actually give the whole relationship thing a go. Maybe.

“If you don’t mind, I’m going to go talk to that pretty brunette,” Peter said, blushing a bit. Sirius yelled his blessings a bit loud, causing the poor girl to look up even before Peter could introduce himself.

“He’s a catch, all for women’s rights and everything,” Sirius shouted as Remus shook his head and steered him away.

“What, I’m just trying to help,” Sirius whined as Remus leaned back against the bar, far from Peter and his rather ambitious paramour.

“I think you’re confusing help with sabotage again,” Remus replied as Sirius settled in beside him. 

“Okay, let me try it again,” Sirius said, turning and quickly grabbing Remus’ chin, tilting his head so their lips were a breath apart. “Can I...sabotage you?”

Remus held it together for a mere five seconds before he burst out laughing. “That sounds so dirty,” he chuckled. 

“Hey, I can’t help it if…” Sirius started before he turned his head, frowning over Remus’ shoulder.

“Sirius?” Remus asked, turning as well. He wasn’t sure what his boyfriend was staring at. There were dozens of patrons behind them in various stages of drunkenness, but no one who warranted Sirius’ undivided attention. “Hey,” he started again, “did you see something?”

“Huh?” Sirius said after a moment, his eyes coming back to Remus. “It’s just, I thought I saw someone.”

“Okay…” Remus started.

“Someone who shouldn’t be here.”

“Do you want to leave?” Remus asked, not liking how suddenly sober and serious the other man seemed. 

‘Nah, it’ll be okay, I’m sure I imagined I saw him.”

“Old boyfriend?” Remus asked before he could help it. Damn it, the last thing he needed to see was whatever gorgeous heartthrob Sirius used to date. He had enough insecurities in this relationship as it was.

“Not even close. I thought it was my brother,” Sirius said sadly.

“Oh, that’s not...is that bad?” Remus asked.

“I don’t know,” Sirius replied cryptically. 

“Okay,” Remus said. “Well let’s head back with the shots if you’re sure. Looks like James and Lily have patched things up.”

“What? Oh yeah,” Sirius said, still distractedly glancing about. “Sorry, yeah let’s go, I definitely need another drink.”

...oooO0Oooo…

Two rounds of shots later and both men were ready to return home. Sirius had been not-so subtly becoming more and more flirtatious as the night wore on, his arm slipping from Remus’ shoulder down to his waist and lazily touching him. He’d lean in close, whispering in Remus’ ear or lean his head on his shoulder and nuzzle close. 

Only when Remus felt the hand around his waist slipping ever so lightly down toward his lap did he startle, glancing around the booth and hoping no one noticed. Luckily all his friends seemed keen on their own separate conversations, not that anything was visible beneath the table regardless. Remus continued to look straight ahead as Sirius’ hand began to slowly kneed him through his trousers. It was still completely baffling to Remus how much Sirius actually wanted him, even to be so bold as to grope him in public. But damn it felt amazing. He bit his lip, feeling himself harden against Sirius’ palm as he stroked firmly before reaching lower to cup his balls. Remus couldn’t help it as his hips bucked a bit, pressing himself into Sirius’ grasp. Long fingers reached up to trace the outline of his rigid cock playfully. Only then did Remus turn to see the smug grin on his boyfriend’s face beneath lust-filled eyes. 

“Let’s get out of here,” Remus all but pleaded quietly as Sirius’ smile widened.

“Good, cause I want to take you home and fuck you into the mattress,” Sirius whispered back.

Remus colored and looked down, taking a deep breath to calm himself. He didn’t want to stand and have his friends’ eyes drawn to his incredibly obvious erection. And yet he needed to be home and in bed, naked with Sirius about two minutes ago. Damn he wished he could just apparate from place to place, it would make times like this so much more convenient. 

“I think we’re gunna head home,” Sirius said, stretching before scooting out of the booth.

“They just want to bang,” James said as he rolled his eyes to Lily.

“Who even says ‘bang’ anymore?” Lily replied, watching poor Remus as he blushed and looked away. 

“You’re soon-to-be boyfriend,” James said boastfully as Lily made a disgusted noise and playfully pushed him away. 

The embarrassment was enough to wilt Remus’ erection, so he stood carefully as Sirius wrapped an arm back around his waist. 

“Don’t be jealous,” Sirius said, winking at the group as he steered Remus away from the table to a chorus of “good night,” “sleep well,” and “wear a condom please!” 

“Damn James,” Remus muttered, blushing as he all but ran from the pub. Sirius only laughed and held him tight, grinning at anyone who gave them an appraising look. “I hope Lily tells him off again.”

“Oh I’m sure he’s going to be looking forward to a lifetime of that. Between Lily’s no-nonsense attitude and his own endless stupidity…”

“Yeah, well at least they make a good looking couple,” Remus supplied. “Speaking of...you look really...hot tonight.” Remus blushed. Again. Damn it. 

“Oh yeah? Been checking out the goods?” Sirius said, doing a twirl on the street before wiggling his eyebrows back at Remus.

Remus shrugged, trying to act casual. “I mean, they’re nice pants. And the plaid shirt totally goes with your whole hipster vibe…”

“You take it back Remus Lupin!” Sirius shouted playfully, standing in close and narrowing his eyes. Remus couldn’t help but laugh. 

“Fine,” he conceded, reaching to stick a hand in Sirius’ back pocket, squeezing his ass through the thin worn denium that hugged it so nicely. “But only because I can’t wait to take it off of you once we’re home.”

Sirius grinned and Remus held his breath. He hadn’t realized it but he had begun to think of Sirius’ place as home more so than his own. Biting his lip, Remus looked away and hoped Sirius didn’t realize or care. His mind was probably stuck on the part about Remus taking his clothes off anyway. Then strong arms pulled him close and firm lips began kissing Remus softly. 

“Let’s go home then,” Sirius said against his mouth, hooking his own hand in Remus’ back pocket as they began to walk the two blocks back.

Remus nodded, turning to kiss Sirius once more but frowned and glanced over his shoulder before he got the chance. Sensing his sudden anxiety, Sirius turned back as well.

“Huh, I thought I saw someone,” Remus said, trying to act casually. It wasn’t at all uncommon to have pedestrians on the street at night, but something just felt off to Remus. Furrowing his brow, Sirius took a moment to peer into the shadows before pulling Remus along. It was probably nothing, Remus told himself, shaking off the unease as he chatted casually with Sirius. 

Sirius seemed a bit more uncomfortable thought, glancing over his shoulder every few steps as they quickened their pace. The unmistakable sound of shoes scuffling on concrete could be heard behind them and their conversation died as both men listened intently. Putting a hand to Sirius’ chest, Remus stopped abruptly, but when they did, they heard nothing out of the ordinary. As they neared Sirius’ building, Sirius ducked into a shadowed area off to the side, pulling Remus with him, both men holding their breath. Neither could shake their unease. Someone was definitely following them. 

Sure enough, after thirty seconds past, a shadowy figure appeared in the yellow lamplight, its head twisting about, searching for them. 

“Fuck,” Sirius swore softly after a moment and Remus looked over to see his eyes narrowed and body completely tense. Holding Remus by the hand, Sirius stood from their crouched position, making themselves known as the figure glanced their way. 

“What are you doing following me Regulus?” Sirius asked in a chilling voice. Remus glanced from man to man. He’d never heard Sirius address someone so coldly. 

“Maybe I was just in the neighborhood,” the figure replied, stepping closer so Remus could finally see his face. When he did, Remus stepped back in shock. It was like looking at an older, sickly version of Sirius. His grey eyes were glassy and unfocused, his black hair lanky and his frame so thin that his wrinkled clothes hung off him like a scarecrow. 

“Yeah right,” Sirius replied. “What do you want? Let me guess, money?”

Regulus stiffened but then smiled, trying to act nonchalant. “Why can’t I just want to see how my snobby, rich, too-good-for-his-own-family big brother is doing?”

Well that explained it, Remus thought. Sirius really had noticed his brother in the pub. No wonder he looked like he’d seen a ghost. Though the fact that Regulus looked so much older than Sirius despite being younger was quite disconcerting. 

“Yep, keep insulting me, that’s a great way to get me to help you,” Sirius sighed, shaking his head. “Come on Remus, I don’t have time for this.”

“Wait, Sirius no!” Regulus yelled, coming up close, barely a foot from the two. Sirius frowned and took a step back. “I didn’t mean it okay? You’re my brother. Brothers are supposed to be there for one another.”

“Uh huh,” Sirius said, looking down at the wasted man. “Tell me why you’re here or we’re leaving.”

“Well you know how it is, times are tough. I just need to get back on my feet. I know you have money, if you could just help me out until…”

“Nope, sorry. Gotta go,” Sirius said, turning on his heel.

“Sirius!” Regulus said, grabbing for Sirius’ arm. 

Sirius turned slowly, his eyes traveling from where Regulus’ bony fingers gripped his bicep and up to the other man’s face. Eyes cool, narrowed and full of disgust, Sirius stared his brother down until the younger man let go and backed away quickly, shaking visibly.

“Does Mom know you’re here?” he asked coolly. “Oh wait, let me guess, she’s the one who told you my address.”

“She thought you could help me, you know you should be there for us, we’ve always been there for you Sirius.”

“If you count stealing my money, trying to run me over and berating me as ‘being there,’ then yeah, you have. Good for you, I guess I’m not as good a person. Have a nice life Regulus.”

Sirius nudged Remus in front of him toward the building, glancing back to make sure Regulus didn’t try anything. 

“You’re so mean!” Regulus yelled behind them. “I hope you know what a fucking bastard you are, not caring about family, only about yourself. You rich snob, I hope you and your money and fuckboys are happy in hell!”

Remus clenched his fist and made to turn around but Sirius stopped him. “He’s sick Remus. Really, it’s not worth it. Let’s just go home.”

Letting out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding, Remus unclenched his fist and looked back, suddenly feeling sorry for the pathetic man standing alone in the cold night air. “Okay, but I think I deserve an explanation.”

Scrubbing a hand angrily through his hair, Sirius let out a dejected sigh. “Yeah, yeah you do.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a strange encounter with Regulus, Sirius and Remus have some things to discuss

Remus and Sirius decided to sleep on the matter, concurring that serious discussions were best done over breakfast, not when both were both tired and just a bit tipsy. Plus Sirius seemed quite on edge after the surprise encounter with his younger brother. Frankly so was Remus. There was definitely something wrong with Regulus, and Remus was curious to find out what it was. 

Wearing only one of Sirius’ long t-shirts, Remus strolled through the kitchen, grabbing toast, coffee and mocha creamer to start his day as Sirius sat on the couch waiting for him. 

Sirius looked over as Remus settled beside him, folding his long legs under him as he balanced a plate on his thigh. “How are we supposed to have a serious discussion with you dressed like that?” he smirked.

“I don’t like pants,” Remus said matter-of-factly around a bite of toast. “And quit trying to distract me, you said you’d tell me what that was all about last night. You’re brother seemed…”

“Yeah...he’s...he’s not well,” Sirius sighed, leaning back on the couch and running a hand through his long black hair. “It’s kinda hard to talk about but...I know I owe you an explanation.” Sirius took a deep breath before he began. 

“I always tried to protect him when we were younger. My dad...he wasn’t exactly around much. And when he was, he was a pretty shitty father. So I tried, I tried so hard to be there for Regulus. I’d go to his football games, sneak him into movie theatres, let him hang out with me and my friends. But then...I don’t know, somewhere around secondary school something went wrong. He fell in with the wrong crowd, started staying out late, coming home drunk or stoned. Then the drugs escalated. I don’t even know what he was on by the end. But he was deeply addicted.”

“Sirius,” Remus said soothingly, wrapping an arm around Sirius’ shoulder. 

“He started stealing, first from stores and then from us--my mom and I. I tried to get him help, to talk to him, get him into rehab. He just hated me more for it. So I left as soon as I could. My mom was so mad. She thought we could...I don’t know...cure him with love or something. She never forgave me. It was selfish, I know, but I had to get out,” Sirius said, shaking his head at the barrage of painful memories. 

“No, Sirius you tried. You know it’s not your fault, you can’t control his actions. Especially now that he’s an adult.”

“Yeah,” Sirius said, scrubbing his eyes with the back of his hands, “that doesn’t help with the guilt though.”

“So, he just wants money? For drugs?”

“Maybe? I don’t know. The last time I talked to my mom, she told me he’d gotten caught up in a really bad crowd. A gang I guess. Call themselves the Death Eaters or some shite. Another racist, sexist white power group by the looks of things. He’s always had a superiority complex, guess he fits right in,” he grumbled.

“Damn,” Remus said, pursing his lips. He couldn’t imagine someone related to Sirius being so horrible and elitist. “Well what does he usually do? Will he go away if you just ignore him?”

“He has in the past, I haven’t seen him in almost two years. Can’t believe my mom gave him my address, she’s so stupidly optimistic. Thinks he’s ‘just going through a phase’ or some bullshit.”

“Yeah, that’s a pretty oblivious way to think about the situation,” Remus agreed, taking a sip of his coffee. “It must’ve been pretty shocking to see him after so much time, are you alright?”

“Oh...yeah. I almost didn’t recognize him. That’s why I was so confused at the bar. Couldn’t believe it was him. He’s just...gotten so thin. So strung out. It’s...tough to see.”

Remus held Sirius closer, sensing the other man was in a pretty fragile state. Watching someone you love put themselves through such pain, he couldn’t understand it. But he could be there for Sirius. 

“Did he...did he really try to run you over?” Remus asked, having suddenly remembered part of last night’s conversation.

Sirius nodded. “It was so stupid. I used to drive him home from school. One day, I was waiting for traffic to die down, so my friends and I were hanging out by the boot of the car, talking, laughing, not paying attention. He was super impatient to go, but I told him to wait five more minutes. At some point he must’ve grabbed my keys, cause the next thing I knew, my car was on and he was trying to back over us all.” Sirius laughed sadly. 

“Were you hurt?” Remus asked, shocked.

“Nah, it was such a clunker, barely could drive on the city streets, I don’t know if it could even reach 60. We jumped away in time. I told my mum when we got home, boy was she mad. Beat him with his own belt. I regretted it then. Told him later I was sorry. Me. Sorry for telling on him after he tried to run me over.”

“Did he ever apologize?” Remus asked, already knowing the answer.

“Nah, I’m sure if he ever sobered up, he could feel regret again. But not now. Not like he is.”

“Wow.” Remus let out a deep breath. It was a lot to take in. What Sirius had gone through, such a rough childhood and Remus had barely scratched the surface it seemed. He didn’t want to press further but he was worried about Sirius, what he had said, not only about Regulus but about his mother’s use of corporal punishment and his father being absent were alarming at best. 

“Thank you,” he said, instead of pressing further. “I know it’s hard to talk about, but I’m glad you shared with me. I want to help, or be here for you. Whatever I can do.”

“I know,” Sirius replied, snuggling close, letting himself rest back against Remus’ chest. 

Remus sighed. He hoped he could lift some of the weight, even a fraction of the guilt from Sirius. Could it be the same for him, if he opened up, told Sirius about his past, his scars? He didn’t know. Remus could only hope, but not until he was ready. 

...ooO0O0oo…

It had been a week since Remus and Sirius’ encounter with Regulus, and luckily neither had seen him since. Sirius had called his mother later that morning, telling her to go find her wayward son, but it seemed she was finally coming around to Sirius’ way of seeing things. She came across a bit more hopeless, a bit less optimistic about curing him of his addictions herself, a good sign to Sirius except that it was only due to the fact that Regulus had become more of a problem, harder to control. Apparently he had left home and not returned since his mother had given Regulus Sirius’ address, leaving behind almost all his belongs other than his cellphone. Sirius had told his mum not to worry, that he’d keep an eye out for brother. Neither man was sure if it was a good or bad sign that they hadn’t seen him skulking about the last week, but there was really nothing to be done. Honestly Remus seemed more worried about it than Sirius, who seemed to be quite used to his brother’s ways and shrugged it off. 

“Stop fretting Remus, he’s probably just passed out in a gutter somewhere,” Sirius said, and Remus sighed at the offhanded way Sirius used those words. But maybe it wasn’t his right to judge. Sirius had lived his life with such a brother, this wasn’t at all new to him. 

“Right, sorry,” Remus said, running a hand through his hair. They were due to go meet everyone for drinks later that evening, but the afternoon was theirs and they couldn’t decide what was better, going out or staying in for a lazy day. 

“We could binge watch one of those shows you never have time for,” Sirius suggested, curling closer on the couch to the other man. “Or...wait how do you have charcoal on your cheek, you haven’t drawn since yesterday!” Sirius laughed and wiped at the stubborn smudge while Remus pretended to be offended. 

“Since when do you know my drawing habits?” Remus said, kissing Sirius lightly before taking his sleeve to his cheek. “Actually...that gives me an idea.”

“Oh?” Sirius said, a mad twinkle in his eye. “Please say you want to draw me naked Remus Lupin.”

Remus drew his brows together and attempted to give Sirius his most pathetic puppy-dog impression. “Am I really that easy to read?”

“You’re as easy to read as I am to draw,” he replied laughing and Remus scolded playfully. “So where would you like me? Couch okay?”

Remus nodded as he got up to gather his drawing supplies. Luckily he had come over after class yesterday so he had his pencils and paper ready to go. He turned back to find Sirius already shucking off his shirt and pants unabashedly, causing Remus to chuckle and shake his head. Sirius really was an opportunist when it came to being naked. Running to the kitchen, Remus grabbed a chair and placed it in front of the couch, stuck two charcoal pencils behind his ears and flipped open his sketchbook to a clean page. Only then did he look up to the vision before him. 

Damn. 

Sirius was splayed out over the couch on his side, one leg bent up, the other tucked under, his head resting on a forearm, his free hand dangling loosely, languidly, incredibly close to his naked cock. Remus swallowed. Hard.

“Okay…” he trailed off, his mouth dry. He should be used to this by now, but every time he saw Sirius naked it swept him off his feet like a stupid high schooler whom the prom king randomly said hi to in the hallway.

Sirius looked up at him with bedroom eyes. Whatever that meant. Remus wasn’t quite sure because no matter what room he was in, Sirius seemed to constantly exude sex-appeal. 

“So... I’ll do some warm up sketches first,” Remus said, blinking back to reality, “Then a longer pose if you’re okay?”

“Mmm, whatever you’d like,” Sirius practically purred and Remus bit his lip. Sirius was doing this on purpose he knew, yet Remus didn’t want to give in. He always gave in. But this time he’d see how long he could last.

“Right,” Remus said, biting the end of his pencil before taking a very deep breath and sketching. He went quickly, his pencil gliding in sweeping arches to convey form rather than get into small details. That could come later. For now he did a short study of Sirius’ body, blocking in basic shapes, then turning the paper to draw some closer compositions of bent arms, foreshortened legs, curled fingers, the arch of Sirius’ long neck. When he caught Sirius’ eyes finally they were hooded, watching him closely under dark brows.

“I...I’m going to do a longer sketch now, so try not to move too much,” Remus said softly, flipping the page once more and Sirius smiled at him. And licked his damn lips. Slowly. 

Sirius was definitely doing this on purpose, Remus surmised, feeling his blood rush straight to his cock. Remus closed his eyes and counted to ten, willing his erection to die down enough so he could concentrate. He was sure Sirius could see it, he was only wearing a shirt and boxer briefs after all. Remus shook his head and decided he could do this. He just needed to look anywhere but Sirius’ face. Or cock. Or abs, or legs...damn he had perfect legs. Okay he could draw his…

“Remus, you still want me like this?” Sirius asked, his voice a bit lower than usual.

Oh he was definitely doing this on purpose. Remus steeled his resolve, grabbed the softer lead pencil from behind one ear and started a light sketch. He tried to think clinical thoughts, of anatomy and muscle, bones and the connective tissue of the body. It seemed to be working. 

Remus had the basic shapes down and started to fill in the form with light and shadow, using the harder lead to add weight to the lines as appropriate points and junctures. He sketched in the slight curl at the ends of Sirius’ long hair as it fell over his shoulder and between his fingers, the dark sweep of his lashes, the shadow of hip bones and abdominal muscles under that smooth stomach. When he went into detail Sirius’ face more closely he attempted to capture the faint smile Sirius always had, like he was up to a bit of mischief, the deep prominent cheekbones and long aristocratic nose that always made Remus think Sirius would’ve been a nobleman in another life. He filled in the shape of Sirius’ toned arms, his smooth chest, the definition of his stomach then down to the arm that rested on his hip, draping down to… Remus blushed and bit his lip. Sirius was ever so lightly stroking himself, his cock half hard in his grip, deep grey eyes staring fixedly on Remus. Remus didn’t even notice. His own gaze was locked on Sirius’s fingers and the sinful things they were doing. Repeatedly. He didn’t see the way Sirius’ mouth curved up at one corner, watching Remus watched him, happy he had finally won at distracting his lover. 

Pencil posed at the same point on his paper, unmoving, Remus stared blankly as his mind stumbled over the delicious image before him. Sirius had coaxed his cock to full hardness, the curved shaft held tight in his grip, the reddened tip slapping lightly against his abdomen with every stroke. Then Sirius let out a low moan and Remus became so hard it hurt. His erection strained against the cotton of his briefs, arching obscenely against the fabric, a circle of wetness betraying him as it grew larger at the tip.

“Remus,” Sirius said roughly, eyes full of lust as he ran his tongue lightly over his own lips, gaze heavy for Remus as he still sat frozen. “If you don’t get over here soon I’m going to finish on my own.”

As enticing a sight at that would be to see, Remus was far too willing to participate. Dropping his drawing supplies he got stiffly up from the chair and walked the three steps to the other man, yelping lightly as Sirius caught his around the waist and pulling him down, pinning him beneath him on the large couch. 

“I thought you were going to make me wait forever,” Sirius admonished, pressing his lips to Remus’ neck, making him arch into the touch. Remus gasped, his body primed to Sirius’ touch as he shivered, enraptured in the feel of Sirius’s lips ghosting over his skin, his fingers lightly gripping his hips, stroking his back and running down his ass. 

“I...I was trying to draw you,” he somehow strung together as Sirius attempted to banish all rational thoughts from his mind. 

“And I was trying to fuck you,” Sirius replied, taking the shell of Remus’ ear in his teeth, nipping lightly before licking inside, causing Remus to buck his hips. He felt Sirius’ cock against his hip, the press of hard flesh begging for release, for friction and warmth he knew his body would provide.

“Then do it,” Remus spoke softly, barely understanding his own words as Sirius moaned in reply. He already knew he was gone, he could deny Sirius nothing. Sirius gave Remus a deep, demanding kiss, his tongue hot and heavy in Remus’ mouth. Then his hands were on Remus’s hips, guiding him up as Sirius got to his knees, his body arched down over Remus. Remus felt the wet heat of Sirius through his briefs, the warmth and pressure of a tongue licking his clothed cock as Sirius mouthed him. Remus swore.

Lightly he pushed back Sirius’ chin, looking down as Sirius gazed longingly up at him. Remus swore he could come from this alone. But he wanted more. 

Sirius smirked, keenly aware of Remus’ heavy breathing, the hard cock mere inches from his mouth, the intense effect he had upon his lover. Remus bit his lip as Sirius massaged him through the damp cloth of his boxers. 

“If you have any objections to me stripping you and fucking you senseless on this couch, tell me now,” Sirius said, his breathing harsh, eyes glazed over in lust.

Not given to vocalizing his wants, Remus merely shook his head and pulled Sirius down for a deep lingering kiss, threading his hands through the long locks of hair that were every bit as soft as they appeared. He let his actions speak for him. 

As they kissed, Sirius’ busy hands flitted down Remus’ sides, ghosting over his clothed skin, leaving as shiver of pleasure in their wake. Remus could feel everything through the thin cotton shirt, and though he longed to be completely naked alongside Sirius, even after over a month he wasn’t quite ready. Luckily they didn’t have to be naked for this. 

Sirius’s hands pulled at the elastic of his boxer briefs, sliding the material down Remus’s hips and lean thighs, the band catching momentarily on Remus’ cock before it popped free to strain upwards against his stomach. 

“Damn you’re hot,” Sirius said softly, throwing the clothing behind him on the floor, causing Remus to blush. He had no illusions about his looks, especially compared to Sirius who was practically an adonis come to life, yet when Sirius praised him, he strangely believed him. 

“You’re beautiful,” Remus replied softly, running soft fingers along Sirius’ prominent cheekbone, cradling his face. There could be no doubt why Sirius was a model. He truly was perfect to behold.

Sirius shook his head but in an accepting way, like he couldn’t believe Remus was here with him. Then with one hand he reached beneath the couch, furrowing his brow for a bit before coming up with a small bottle of lube. 

“Did you put that there just in case?” Remus teased, though he was honestly grateful that they wouldn’t have to interrupt their activities.

Sirius shrugged and popped it open, spreading the viscous liquid on his fingers. “Maybe I placed lube in each room of the house, just in case.”

“Oh, ‘maybe?’” Remus inquired playfully.

“Well we will just have to have sex everywhere and you can find out,” Sirius replied before taking his free hand, pushing back Remus’s legs. 

Remus’ body clenched unbidden in anticipation. A damp finger trailed down, from the base of his cock to his entrance as Sirius locked eyes with him, gaze unwavering. Then ever so slowly Sirius breached him, his cool fingertip warming as it pressed forward, taking his time and allowing Remus to adjust. But Remus wanted more. With a small buck he took in the entirety of Sirius’ finger, gasping slightly and then rocking into the touch as Sirius found his prostate.

Opening his eyes, Remus found Sirius staring down hungrily at him and he nodded for the other man to continue. A second finger, then a third made themselves known, stretching Remus open with care, until he was moaning into the other man’s touch, cock leaking onto his shirt and gasping “more” over and over. 

So Sirius obliged. Freeing his hand from Remus’ body, Sirius slicked himself, groaning at his own touch as long fingers gripped and pulled his cock. Remus watched in awe. One of these times he’d have to simply do that, let Sirius touch himself as he gazed on, find satisfaction in seeing his lover bring himself off. Yet not today. Today he ached for Sirius. 

As carefully as he had prepared Remus, Sirius entered his lover. Remus held his breath, staving himself against the inevitable pressure and burn, concentrating on the fact that Sirius wanted him, needed him. At points he felt near to bursting, and Sirius, reading his subtle expressions and hitches of breath would slow or stop, allowing Remus time to adjust to his girth. Then, as if by magic, the pain transformed, the burn became white hot friction and Sirius angled himself perfectly to spark all the pleasure centers of Remus’ body. Sighing into the embrace, Remus opened his eyes, looking up to find Sirius above him, body taut, lean muscles hard as he braced himself from giving into his body’s desire. 

Remus shook his head, amazed how considerate his lover was. But that was not what he needed right now. With one hand he gripped Sirius by the ass, pressing him forward as the other man gave a short yelp. Sirius’s eyes widened then he threw back his head, moaning in pleasure as he was allowed to give in. 

“Fuck I need you Remus,” Sirius said, pistoning his hips, ramming hard into Remus, his thighs slapping loudly against Remus’ ass. 

Remus took in the image, the beautiful man above him, watching as his thick reddened cock drove in and out of his own hungry body, mesmerized and full of need. His hand reached across his shirt, gripping himself tightly, needing the harsh pull of his fingers to bring himself closer to the edge, chasing the high of orgasm that Sirius was pushing him toward. Remus ground his ass backward, back into Sirius, the dual sensations of his own hand and Sirius’ cock alighting his body with a mind-numbing fire. Tugging himself hard, Remus fingers gripped his overly sensitive skin before Sirius reached down to take over, his hand finding a rhythm to match as he pistoned over and over, pressing deep within Remus against his prostate. Sirius tugged Remus’ hips up higher, burying his cock within Remus’ flushed body, groans and profanities slipping past his lips as he looked down, locking eyes with Remus through the haze of pleasure.

“Remus! Remus! I’m going to…Fuck!” And then Sirius yelled, his orgasm overtaking him as he drove inside Remus in erratic thrusts, ramming over and over until his body relaxed, his lust sated. Remus was so close, so infuriatingly close, yet Sirius had stilled his grip upon Remus’ cock which twitched in longing for release. Then Sirius was pulling out, the incredible pressure on his prostate released, and Remus cried out in frustration.

“Sirius,” he moaned, bucking his hips, hip body primed to burst. Then he looked up, seeing the sated smile on Sirius’ face only moments before those perfect lips took his cock in, sucking him deep. Two fingers slid inside him, slick with Sirius’ own cum, and Remus found that was all he needed. Choking on his own breath, Remus arched off the couch, coming with one thrust down Sirius’ throat, his legs wrapping around the other man’s shoulders as he shuddered and rode out the waves of pleasure. Everything went blinding white, his every nerve sang with need and all too soon it was too much, his cock overly sensitive as he sank down and Sirius released him.

Remus tasted himself on Sirius’s lips as the other man fell upon him, kissing him languidly, draping one long leg over Remus’ own, fitting together like two perfect puzzle pieces. 

“That was exactly what I wanted to do to you the first time you drew me, you know,” Sirius said after a minute, finally able to catch his breath.

“I’m not sure I would’ve been able to say no to you,” Remus said honestly, remembering the instant hunger he had felt for the other man. 

“Well I am irresistible,” Sirius replied cockily, his fingers lazily tracing Remus side. He stopped momentarily and only then did Remus realize his shirt had ridden up, inadvertently displaying his multitude of scars. Remus sucked in a breath, suddenly still, his mind racing. But to his credit Sirius didn’t even look down, simply pulled at Remus’ shirt until it slid to his hips, gaze unwavering as he smiled down at Remus.

“Thank you,” Remus said softly as his heart attempted to slow, his anxiety immediately lessened.

Sated and sleepy, Sirius snuggled closer into Remus’ neck, his words almost lost against the other man’s skin. “Of course love.”

Remus’s eyes went wide as he lay awake, Sirius asleep in his arms, unable to do anything but think about the honesty of those softly spoken words.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been so long since an update, this ch was really emotional for me to write cause it's pretty personal. Not only did I go to art school, like Remus, but like Sirius I have struggled with watching a family member go through addiction. I put myself into this chapter, everything from having my sister try to run me over to my parents thinking they can cure addiction with love.   
> To balance the sirius-ness (XD) I threw in a sex scene! I'll update again soon <3


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remus decides it's finally time to reveal his scars to Sirius, followed by phone sex and even some plot!

“Remus Lupin, you’re in love!”

Remus sputtered and almost spit his cocoa at the much-too-observant redhead who sat across from him in the University food court. He and Lily had just been talking about how overly complicated their graphic design teacher made every single program when she decided to chime in with this incredibly random non-sequitur.

“I don’t know what you’re…” Remus began but was immediately shut down. 

“Oh please, spare me. You may normally be surrounded by a bunch of unobservant blokes, but me, I see things,” she said, waving her hand about in the air. 

“Uh huh, and these ‘things’ are…”

“Well let’s see, you’ve spend practically every night at Sirius’ flat for the past two months from what James says, can’t stop talking about him even when a topic has nothing to do with Sirius, and you sigh. A lot.”

Remus rolled his eyes. 

“You leave naked drawings of him out where your nosy flatmates might find,” Lily continued and Remus turned beet red. God damn Peter for searching through his sketchbook for a piece of paper to write a message on the other day. 

“I bet you’ve written ‘Remus Black’ all over your notebook,” Lily finished, batting her eyes dramatically.

“That’s ridiculous Lil,” Remus said with a sigh. “We’ve already decided he’d obviously take my last name.”

Lily giggled. “So?”

“So...yeah,” Remus affirmed, looked up, took a deep breath and then back at his friend. 

“Wow,” Lily said and Remus nodded. “Does he know?”

“I...I don’t think so,” Remus said, scratching the back of his neck. “At least I haven’t said it. I can’t seem to...I swear girls are so much better at all this feeling talk than guys.”

“Making you wish you were straight?” Lily laughed.

“Hardly. I just wish I had better timing. I never know when to say it.”

Lily frowned and bit her lip in thought. “Has he said it? Maybe if he says it first…”

“Not really.”

“What does that mean?” Lily asked, leaning forward on the table, her chin in her hands.

“Well, he called me ‘love.’ Twice.”

“Oh!”

“Once he was sleepy, the other time I think he thought I was asleep,” Remus shrugged.

“Aww he loves you!” Lily cooed. 

Remus crinkled his brow and smiled. He certainly hoped so, though why someone as beautiful and amazing as Sirius Black could love him was beyond speculation. 

“Well when the time is right to say it, you’ll know. And maybe for now, do something to show him. Like how he calls you ‘love,’ find something to prove how much you care.”

Remus took a second to ponder Lily’s wise words. “I think I know just the thing.”

...oooOO0OOooo…

Two nights later, Remus found himself once again staying over at Sirius’ flat. Sirius was curled against his side, breathing slowly evening out after Remus had practically fucked him into the mattress, his long black hair lying across both their bodies like spilt ink. Remus gazed down, completely undone by the beautiful man he got to call his lover. Sirius’s eyes were closed in contentment, a slight flush on his cheeks, one leg wrapped around Remus’ thigh and his cock softening against his hip. One long hand still gripped Remus’ shirt and Remus brought his own fingers up to intertwine them together. He felt Sirius’s eyes open, eyelashes fluttering against his neck, before pressing against him more fully. 

Steadying himself with a deep breath, Remus brought Sirius’ and his hands lower, guiding them down his clothed chest and stomach to the line where his shirt met his hips. This was it, he told himself, he could do this. Show Sirius the same trust the other man had done in opening up to him. To give Sirius his past and let him hold it and keep it.

“Remus?” Sirius asked quietly, tentatively, as he moved Sirius’s fingers beneath his shirt, using his own atop Sirius’s to guide along the map of scars, the ridges and rivers that cut across his skin, maring him, changing his life forever. Sirius stayed completely silent, allowing Remus to show him his secrets, soft fingertips caressing places Remus had never allowed another man to touch before.

Then he turned to Sirius, looking into those sad grey depths, and kissed him quickly before the other man could see his own unshed tears.

“Take it off me.”

To his credit Sirius did not ask if Remus was sure, did not frown or pull away as Remus had always worried he would. Instead eager fingers grabbed the hem of his shirt and helped him pull it over his head. When his head was free, Remus looked back to see Sirius still gazing into his eyes.

“You can look, you know.”

Sirius nodded, biting his lip as grey eyes glanced down, taking in everything Remus wished to hide from the world. Light fingers came back to trace along his imperfections, ghosting caresses that made him shiver in their unfamiliarity. A flat palm brushed down his stomach then back up, and Sirius turned his eyes back to his lover.

“I think you’ve got firmer abs than I’ve got,” Sirius said in a sulky tone.

Remus couldn’t help but burst out laughing. “That...that’s your takeaway from this?

 

Sirius shrugged. “At least now I get to fully appreciate them. And your chest, Remus how do you have such beautiful muscle definition?”

Remus shook his head. Was the man blind or… “And...the scars?” 

Sirius furrowed one brow. “I hate that you’ve been hurt, been in so much pain. Especially since I wasn’t there to help you. But it doesn’t change one thing about you. You’re still bloody gorgeous.”

“Do you have an eye exam coming up soon or shall I make one for you?” Remus asked, shaking his head.

Sirius leaned over, taking Remus’ chin between his fingers and touching their foreheads. “I’m not lying love. I know you don’t believe me, but I have impeccable taste. Don’t doubt me.”

“Yeah, alright,” Remus sighed and Sirius kissed him hard. 

He fell back into Sirius’ arms, held in acceptance and an utter lack of judgement that was surprising to find these days. They were quiet for while, Sirius tracing a finger along the largest scar on his lower abdomen, his breath warm and comforting against Remus’ neck.

Remus swallowed hard. He wished that was it, that the physical scars were all he held, but there was so much more. Sirius deserved the truth, to hear everything and then decided if he still wanted to stay by his side, if he could still love him as broken as he was.

“I was six when it happened,” Remus said softly, and Sirius turned up his face to meet his patient eyes. “Can’t remember much honestly. Just a loud crash, my dad screaming, my mum...silent.” Sirius’s fingers traced through his hair. “When I woke up, I was in the hospital. I don’t remember how many times I asked for my mum before the nurse finally had to tell me she died. And my dad wasn’t the same after. Never really wanted kids but he stuck around for her. Until the accident. James’ family took me in then.”

Sirius pushed up on his elbows, worried eyes lending comfort as he grasped Remus’s fingers in his own. When Remus didn’t say anything for a minute he kissed him softly.

“I bet she’d be so damn proud of you.”

Remus shrugged. There wasn’t a day he didn't remember her, wonder what she’d think of his life, his decisions. She’d raised him right for six years, but it wasn’t enough. It could never be. There would always be a hole in his heart.

“I’m so glad you survived,” Sirius said softly, tracing the worst of the wounds.

“Almost didn’t. Lost some large intestine, a kidney. Lots of blood. All because of a stupid drunk driver.” There was no longer anger in his voice, just acceptance. He’d lost that part of him long ago. 

“That’s why I started drawing. At first it was to imagine her with me, and dad too. A happy whole family. I drew us a house, a dog. Even a baby sister at one point. Then I started drawing my life, my new life without her. I’d leave the pictures on her grave, so she could see me. You’re right, I always did want her to be proud of me.”

Sirius’s eyes were glassy as he pulled Remus back into his arms, holding him close. “I wish I could’ve met her.”

“Yeah, me too,” Remus sighed and cradled Sirius against his scarred side. 

Perhaps he couldn’t say “I love you” quite yet, but this was pretty damn close.

 

...oooOO0OOooo…

Midterms, Remus decided, were a new form of hell especially designed to keep him away from his boyfriend. It had been two weeks since Remus had finally shown Sirius his scars, revealing his flaws for the other man to judge, and had been so pleasantly shocked that Sirius had shown not an ounce of revolution. If anything their sex life had become better as he found himself less afraid, unwilling to hold back. Well it had been great until every single professor had announced a string of insurmountable midterms that Remus was currently finally finishing. 

Thought he’d barely slept and often forgotten to eat, the worst part was not getting to see Sirius for the past week. Between his studying and Sirius’ modeling, they’d only found time for quick phone conversations before each dropped off only to start all the hard work again the next morning. Plus Sirius had been away the past three days, doing a catalogue in Japan, so though Remus was finally free his lover sadly would not be back for two whole days. 

So Remus went to work and missed Sirius. He came home and missed Sirius. Ate dinner and missed Sirius. It was late, Sirius should just be done with work though Remus was ready for bed, and hoping for a call before he tucked into the couch in Peter and James’ living room. He missed Sirius’ flat, his bed, his presence, but didn’t want to impose while the other man was away, so he’d made due, his back sore from lumpy cushions and his heart heavy with his lover’s absence. 

When the light flashed on his silenced phone, Remus jumped and then smiled at seeing Sirius’ name. He answered on the second ring.

“I miss you.”

Remus bit his lip. “I miss you too. How was the shoot?”

“Good. A bit weird but it could’ve been worse. One of the other models said he’d come from another ad where they dressed him up as a radish with a crown and made him kiss a pair of ladies knickers.”

“Huh. Too bad you didn’t get that gig.”

“Well I did, but I turned it down, can’t have you jealous of a pair of pants,” Sirius laughed.

“Thoughtful of you,” Remus sighed, laying back on the couch. “You back at your hotel?”

“Yeah, just got in. You at my place?”

“Nah, back on Pete’s old couch.”

“Really? Why? You know you can stay over even without me there.”

“I’d probably miss you too much. But thanks,” Remus replied.

“Yeah alright...I really miss you. I know I said it already but I need to say it again.”

“I know, I can’t wait two days to see you,” Remus said.

“Me neither, damn just hearing your voice is getting me hard.”

“Sirius!” Remus whispered loudly into the phone.

“What, it’s true,” Sirius let out a little groan. “I wish you were here to fuck me.”

Remus blushed and felt his cock twitch in his pants. He missed Sirius too, and this wasn’t helping.

“I...me too,” Remus settled on after a moment. 

“Yeah? Sirius said, his voice getting breathier. “Would you take me hard, or soft and gentle?”

Remus’s eyes widened. He could hear Sirius’ voice hitch, the want, the need. He felt it too.

“Wait are you...are you touching yourself?” Remus asked tentatively.

“I am. I want you to get me off, please?” Sirius moaned into his ear. 

Remus had no idea what to do. While the idea was incredibly erotic, he’d never done anything like this, and he rarely was the vocal one during sex. 

He realized he hadn’t responded when Sirius chimed in again. “Let me make you come too.”

Well how could Remus refuse now? “Alright, but I’m in the living room so I have to be quiet,” Remus replied.

“As long as I can hear you come,” Sirius replied and Remus swore he could hear the slap of his hand against his cock. After pinning the phone to his ear with his shoulder, Remus reached down beneath his pajamas, gripping himself roughly. His half hard cock was quickly filling, rising to the occasion, seeking gratification through his own hand and his lover’s words. 

“Are you touching yourself?” Sirius asked and Remus nodded before he remembered he had to answer.

“Yeah.”

“Is your cock hard for me? Are you picturing me sucking you off as you touch yourself?”

Remus swallowed and sped up his fingers, his hips arching slightly off the couch and into his own tight grip. “I...I am.”

“Good, I’m so hard for you,” Sirius moaned, “No one has ever got me as hot as you have. Your cock fucking me, so deep, driving into me, filling me up.”

Remus moaned and pressed his palm into his shaft, gripping the thick length, feeling drops of moisture as precum flowed from the tip, spilling out to coat his fingers. “God I need you,” Remus cried softly and heard Sirius’s hand speed up in response.

“I’m so hard for you Remus, but my hands aren’t enough. I put two fingers in, but I still ache for your cock.”

“Put in three,” Remus breathed, picturing the other man, legs spread, thrusting into his own ass and fist, trying to get off, thinking only of him. 

Sirius cried out, a long low sound that made Remus’s balls ach and tighten with lust. His cock felt hot, so heavy in his grasp, the head swollen and red where it peaked up from his pajamas. He really hoped his roommates did not decide to get up any time soon or they’d see quite an eyeful. When he moaned again it was with less restraint, his need so raw he no longer cared as much if they overheard. 

“What...what are you doing now?” Remus asked, needing to picture Sirius, wanting that extra visual to push him over the edge.

“Fucking my fingers,” Sirius panted, “Wishing they were your thick cock. I need to come so badly.”

Sirius was all but whining now, little ‘yeses’ and ‘pleases’ falling from his lips, urging Remus towards release as he thrust hard into his slick fingers.

“Sirius,” he pleaded, so close yet aware of how far away his lover was. It was incredibly bitter sweet.

“Are you close Remus? I’m so close too. Fuck I’m so hard for you, I wish I could come in your hot mouth” More moans followed and Remus pushed down his pants, getting a better grip on his shaft, watching his cock slap against his stomach, leaving trails of precum against his heated skin. 

He felt so raw, so exposed. Getting off when anyone could walk by, Sirius in his ear, hearing the other man doing exactly the same. Both chasing their own release yet longing for the hands of one another.

“Remus, tell me you want me. Tell me you need to fuck me!”

Remus’ throat tightened. He was so nervous, yet so turned on. But he knew he could do this for Sirius. “I want you so bad Sirius. I can’t... I can’t hold back.” His voice was strained, his breath loud and panting as he arched his hips off the couch, fucking his hand over and over all the while wishing it was Sirius above him, riding him, bringing him off. He looked down his thick length, watching as it moved in his hand, the engorged head leaking onto his stomach, flushed and full and ready to come at any moment.

And then Sirius was crying out in his ear, moaning his name like a prayer before his breath caught in his throat. “Remus, I’m going to come, oh god!” 

Remus head the erratic slap of skin on skin, the longing and lust in the man’s voice as it broke and he spilled over his hand. And then he was coming too, moaning into the phone as he drove into his hand, the shocking release tensing his muscles as he bit his lip to keep from crying out and awaking the others. He felt hot cum spill onto his stomach, drip down his side as he continued to pull on his cock, arching off the couch, chasing every last bit of pleasure until it had softened in his hand and his entire body collapsed back on itself, boneless and sated. 

“Remus?” he heard after a moment, Sirius’ breath shaky over the phone.

“I can’t believe we did that,” Remus groaned softly, listening to see if he’d awakened anyone. With how much he’d given up caring about muffling his voice near the end, he wouldn’t be surprised. 

“So bloody hot,” Sirius murmured smugly and Remus had to agree.

“Yeah, just hope no one heard or I’ll never hear the end of it.”

“They’re just jealous cause you’re dating a model.”

“Probably,” Remus agreed, sighing back into the couch. What he wouldn’t give for Sirius to be here, holding him, falling asleep together instead.

“I’ll be home before you know it,” Sirius said, as if sensing his thoughts. 

...oooOO0OOooo…

And Sirius was right. The next day went by in a blur as Remus worked and focused on anything but missing his boyfriend. He went out to the pub after, attempting to enjoy himself with James, Peter and Lily and was thusly distracted until late that night.

Seeing as Sirius would be back early the next morning, Remus had decided to stay over a his place that night, a nice surprise for his boyfriend when he returned from his trip. Peter, who lost a bet and was relegated to designated driver, dropped him off on the corner outside Sirius’ flat a bit after midnight.

“Have fun!” Lily called as they made to drive off.

“Come to the pub with us tomorrow,” Peter shouted.

“And tell your boyfriend you can’t have phone sex on our couch again!” James added as they sped away.

“What...we didn’t… damn it they did hear,” Remus muttered, blushing profusely as he watched the taillights disappear. 

He climbed the steps, wondering just how he could possibly face his friends again, when a shadow caught his eye. Remus frowned, taking a step back as it detached from the doorway. Moonlight illuminated aristocratic features, a long nose, steel grey eyes, perfect cheekbones against long black hair.

“Siri...Regulus?” Remus said, after the man stepped farther into the light. It was incredible how much he looked like his brother. An older, broken version of Sirius. He frowned when the other man took a step closer.

“What are you doing here?” Remus asked in a calm even tone. They hadn’t seen a trace of Regulus in weeks, and for him to appear out of nowhere, when Sirius was gone, seemed hardly a coincidence. Was he making to rob the place and Remus had caught him in the act? Remus glanced to the other man’s hands for weapons but found them empty. He glanced back up to bloodshot grey eyes and shivered slightly.

“Ah, hello again Boytoy,” Regulus finally said, his words bitter and biting. 

Remus did not feel like correcting the man so he shook off the insult and tried again. “Regulus, why are you here? Sirius will be back soon so if you need him you can come back later.” He decided lying was best, no need to inform the crazed man that his brother was away.

Regulus cocked his head to the side and smiled. “You’re a bad liar Boytoy. I know he’s gone until tomorrow. Heard you say so at the pub to your friends. So it’s just us.”

“Alright then,” Remus said, biting his lip. He knew he could easily take the wasted man in a fight, but he’d really rather not start anything when he could de-escalate a situation instead. So Remus held up his hands, insuring Regulus knew he was unarmed. “Well what do you want then?”

Suddenly Regulus looked about to cry. “I want a lot of things! I want my brother back, I want what he owes me, so selfish, so mean! He’s just mean!” he screamed before taking a deep breath. 

“Okay,” Remus said, shocked at the manic mood swings of the other man. “I...Sirius has said he wants that too. He misses you.” He hoped to placate Regulus but had no idea what to say. Apparently that wasn’t it.

“Fuck you!” Regulus spat, stepping closer, eyes dark in anger. “You stole him! He’s my brother!”

“Uh…” Remus swallowed hard. Placating the irrational man was not coming easily. “Regulus, Sirius really he misses you. He wants his brother back.”

“Don’t say his name! He’s no brother of mine!” Regulus fumed, contradictory and illogical. Remus was completely at a loss.

“Well, let me help you get him back. I can talk to him. We can call him now,” Remus said, pulling out his phone.

“Oh you’d like that! Calling, calling…” Regulus trailed off and Remus eyes widened. The man was truly insane. “Then they can listen in, hear me, find me! But I won’t let them! You don’t win this round.”

Remus wondered what on earth Regulus was going off about. Was he purely delusional, paranoid about nothing, or was someone really after him? He recalled Sirius saying the man had ties to a white power group, the Death Eaters, was this related to that horrible affiliation? Glancing behind himself, Remus wondered how effective it would be to just turn and run. He was sure he could outrun Regulus, although getting down the steps quickly without tripping in the dim light might be precarious. Turning back to Regulus, he swallowed when he saw an odd glint in his eye.

“But don’t worry Boytoy. You’ll still help me.”

Remus heard a sound to his right and his eyes widened, readying to turn and fight. Then everything went dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for being so patient while I figured out this chapter! I hope the reveal of Remus's scars was okay! And also the phone sex...it's not something I've done but then again I'm also not a wizard, werewolf or male art student dating a model!   
> Also I have another Wolfstar fic, Counting Stars, that's up if anyone wants an angsty post Azkaban fic! I promise it'll have a happy ending (after a bunch of unrequited love cause mama needs her drama!)

**Author's Note:**

> Took inspiration from my art school days, love any comments/critique so I can improve!


End file.
